Three Lives

I did it and I'm back and I'm sorry

2007-08-09T11:07:00.000-07:00

So so so so so sorry to everyone who was worried about me.
The good news is I'm fine.
Thanks Peter, Kinzy, Racooooon and everyone else.

The better news is that I've just hit save on the final chapter of my PhD.
Yes yes, I know that I said I wasn't going to do it anymore in my last post- but I just couldn't help myself. I've finished 10 months ahead of schedule- just because I can. I haven't cleaned my oven for a couple of weeks though!

It's been two years, one month and five days since I started my PhD on the fear of terrorism. 10 Focus groups and 60 interviews and 140 000 words and 360 pages later I'm done! In the meantime I seem to have developed an unsightly haunch in my shoulders, a permanent frown and a somewhat nasty disposition (as opposed to my usual sun shiny shiny happy happy disposition).

OK- so let's get up to date.
Marraige- working- YAY. After some really long talks and some laying down of the laws things are working out OK. I basically told himbo that I did not want great sex and physical attraction to be my 'everything'. Sounds lame hey! And I just know that you blokes out there are now shaking your heads furiously and mouthing 'oh noooooooooooooo' while desperately hitting the exit button before your partners see this post and start getting ideas!
But it's true. Everyone I've ever spoken to about marraige problems seems to have the same problem- bad sex. They enjoy a great spiritual and intellectual connection, they describe their partners as their 'best friend' but say they would like more sex. True, that everyone I've ever spoken to about marraige problems happens to be male- but that's beside the point. I have the exact opposite problem- great sex but no intellectual connection. So here's what I did...
I demanded less sex and more connection! I put a limit on all sexual activity and reduced the frequency from 5-7 times a week to 3-4 times a week AND (here's the best bit) I made a new rule that we have to talk about our feelings more. That bit hasn't really worked mainly because I'm not really into talking about feelings unless I'm feeling particularly PMSful. The late late nights working on my thesis have assisted with the sex reduction strategy though.
I hate sounding like a sappy chick flick so I'm going to stop there.

What's next? Oh, I've been very busy writing- not just my thesis- I've been asked to contribute chapters to two books- academic stuff- not the creative kind. I have also been researching a book of my own which I hope to churn out one day (once I get my posture and my sun shiny shiny back). It will be about the discourse of jihad and the ontogenetic power of the jihadi message.

On the political front- Hilaly is out and some other old fart is in his place. I hear this guy is better- the less I hear from him the better I'll think he is! Apart from that am loving watching our PM John Howard squirm in the knowledge that nobody loves him everybody hates him, he should go eat worms! Am hoping that the election will be called soon so that we can all vote him out of office. Not that puppet head, Kevin Rudd, is any better. Anybody else think he looks like a Chucky doll? Maybe it's just me and that nasty disposition of mine.

On the subject of elections- the big big news is that I was approached by a political party (which I can't reveal here because it would blow my cover) to run for a Senate Seat in this years elections. It's really not a big deal as it is highly unlikely that I'll get a seat given that I'm third on the Senate ticket but it is nice to be asked and I really wanted to do it just to let all the Muslim girls out there know that you don't have to hide behind a burqa- you can leave the shadows and it's ok if you do.

And that's about it- boring I know- but most of my time has been spent cultivating a love affair with my laptop (I know which buttons to push to turn it on).
Love to all
TUS

I can, I can, I can, I can't

2007-04-07T08:15:00.000-07:00

I can graduate with high honors
I can survive a massive haemmorage after an illegal backyard abortion in a seedy looking Cairo back street (will tell that story one day)
I can withstand the pain of child birth (for 10 hours followed by 2 hours of pain relief)
I can do the midnight dash to the emergency ward with a 6 year old who is turning blue
I can stare into the face of a violent husband, hold a knife to his throat, threaten to kill him if he hits me again, then walk away and never look back (will tell this story too)
I can let the past go and help him to reconnect with his children
I can change a tyre, fix a leaking tap, hang a picture, paint a house, sew curtains, lay tiles, put together Ikea furniture, use a jigsaw, dig a pond, plant a garden and install a shelf
I can also burn out a car engine because I forgot to put oil in it
I can raise two children on very little money
I can earn six figures
I can complete a 50 page report on domestic violence among Muslim communities in 2 (very long) days and have it launched by a senior politician a month later
I can jog for 40 minutes
I can dine and chat comfortably with diplomats, academics and homeless people alike
I can complete a Masters degree in 9 months
I can complete a PhD in 2.5 years
I can tutor my son in highschool physics even though I've never studied it
I can read Foucault and get him and then I can explain him to my students
I can stand up in a room of 100 or so men, know they are probably more interested in checking out my breasts, and within one minute, have them hanging on my every word as I talk about terrorism and fear
I can stand up to a group of armed bikies taunting a Chinese student and get the group to disperse
I can write about the dark days of my teenage years and be OK about it
I can MC an event, appear on TV, sit on a panel and go live on radio without breaking into a nervous sweat
I can forgive my sister, my parents and myself
I can perform CPR

I read an article today in which this woman talks about how she was always gunning for an A+ in her marraige and I realised that's me.
Always trying to be the best at everything- the best wife, the best lover, the best mother, the best daughter, the best sister, the best student, the best teacher, the best stepmum, the best friend, the best worker.
Most of the time I think I'm probably just scraping in with a C even though I put this incredible pressure on myself. It's not enough for me to be average, or even good. No, I have to be perfect!

I can't just finish my Phd in the alotted 3 years, like everyone else- no I have to finish it in 2.5 eventhough my generous scholarship is for 3 years.
I can't just clean the kitchen like normal people- no I have to take apart the stove, scrub the little knobs till they glisten, I have to scrub the pots, I have to polish the kettle, rearrange the bloody sugar and tea cannisters for crying out loud and clean the oven 3 times in one day.
I can't just mark my students essays with ticks or crosses- no I have to write each one of them an essay back- commenting on virtually every line they have written. Then I have to take 20 hours to speak to each one of them individually about their essays (trust me- there is no university lecturer who does this!)

The worst part is that I don't want to be like this! I don't want to be bloody perfect and I don't want to exhaust myself trying anymore. Perfection is highly over rated.
I don't want to be that little girl who waits eagerly for her husband to come home, look at the gleaming kitchen with its shiny kettle and glistening nobs- praying that he nods his approval- just so that she can give herself an A+

I don't want to do it anymore.

Happiness?

2007-04-04T22:07:00.000-07:00

I reckon that there are people in this world who just don't know how to find their own happiness. They look to others to make them happy, relying on those around them to take responsibility for their lives.

Then there are people in this world who measure their self worth by the happiness of those around them. They take it on themselves to be responsible for others' lives. They live for it, infact, measuring their successes and failures in life on the basis of those around them.

What happens when these two people get together?

In some ways it's the perfect union-symbiotic almost- one needs the other to be happy and one needs the other to make happy- but it's not. It's far from perfect.

I reckon I'm a pretty happy kind of person. Sure I've faced trials, heartache, sadness and hard times in my life. So what? Who hasn't? Everybody has a story- everybody.

I've been on the verge of death and back.
I've been forced to make choices that I didn't want to make, that I wasn't prepared to make that I did not have the capacity to make.
I've had days when I could only afford to feed my children and would go without (we were poor but we we had a roof over our heads and warm beds at night)
I've sat by my son's hospital bed in the middle of the night, alone, with noone to talk to, no shoulder to cry on and no hand to reassure me- wodering if he would make it through the night.
I've had days when I felt so alone, so lonely and so lost that I thought I would never make it out of the shadows.

But hasn't everybody? Compared to some people- my life has been a party and at the end of it all- I realise it wasn't half bad after all.

I do not for one minute regret any path that I've taken, any path that I've been forced to take and where I've ended up- it's all good. So, yeah- I'm happy.

But there is one thing that plagues me- a constant niggling, yearning, desire to make everyone else happy.
You might think it comes from a natural urge to nurture and love but I'm not so sure it's all that noble.
Perhaps it's a bit of arrogance- a bit of self adulation that makes me think that I have the capacity to bring happiness where there is misery; hope where there is despair and laughter where there are tears.
Perhaps it is my overblown sense of my own "sun shinyness" that defines failure for me. Failure being when I cannot make someone else happy- when, despite everything that I do, that I sacrifice, that I give- he still cannot find his happiness.

Why? Why do I do that? Why is it so important for me to do everything I possibly can, even if it means going out of my way and making myself 'unhappy', to make someone else happy? And why am I so hurt when it doesn't work?
Every common sense part of me tells me that I'm an idiot- ofcourse I can't make someone else happy- ofcourse happiness can only ever come from within- ofcourse the more I try the more I fail because it's not up to me.

So why do I do it?

Any answers out there?

Again

2007-03-29T03:14:00.000-07:00

It's my birthday today. A big one- one of those ones with a zero on the end- you can guess.

Usually I look forward to my birthday. We have a bit of a tradition where we make a big fuss over birthdays and celebrate in the lead up.

Not this year.

I'll remember this birthday because for the past 5 weeks (has it really been that long?) my husband and I have not spoken, have not touched, have not said more than 2 words to eachother. It's started again and this time I don't think it's going to end in reconciliation or resolution- it never does actually- but this time I know that there is nothing more that I can do.

I've said before that my relationship has been strained and that last year I resolved to just accept the fact that we don't really share an intellectual or emotional intimacy. I was happy with that I guess- or maybe I was just fooling myself.

What does it mean to say "I don't love you anymore"?
It means that I have failed- again.
It means that I once loved you- but somehow that love got lost and I can't seem to find it. I don't know where it went and I haven't been able to hold on to it.
It means that I've finally faced up to the fact that love is not enough. All those romantic notions we had of how our love was strong enough to break cultural divides, transcend differences, live on forever- it was all bullshit.
It means that I'm not strong enough, not able to cope with the constant cycle of good and bad. One day I'm perfect- your dream wife and the next it seems like I'm everything you don't want.
It means that I can't make you happy- I tried but I just can't.
It means that I can't be who you want or need me to be and you can't accept me as I am.

Oh What a Night

2007-03-20T23:02:00.000-07:00

Well the Arrested Development concert would have to be the highlight of the year, possibly the decade.

Apart from the fact that we waited 30 minutes in line and then had to sit through 2 hours of support bands (they weren't too bad except for the guy who thought he was the white and bald Craig David), and fend off the foetuses before Arrested Development finally came on stage at midnight- it was bloody brilliant.

The band played for over an hour. I know I was the biggest fan there because nobody was singing along to Mr Wendall like I was!!
And I was right up the front.

But wait there's more...

After they finished playing they came around and shook hands with all the people in the front row so I got to say a quick hello to them all.

But wait, wait there's more...

After the concert my friends and I were going to get some coffee. We walked behind the club and saw the band leaving. I got to meet them- all of them-Speech, Farida, Neisha and Baba- not just meet them but talk to them, I mean really talk about all sorts of things for around 45 minutes- we talked about life, love, kids and the fact that I have been listening to their music for 17 years. My kids were raised on Arrested Development- it was like milk to them- there is not another 17 or 14 year old in the world who can sing along to Mama's Always on Stage, Rain, Mr Natural and Tennessee like my boys can!

We took photos and said goodbye and I invited the band to a function I was MCing the next day that featured an African fashion parade. They said they'd try to make it and gave me the name of the hotel they were staying at.

But wait, wait, wait there's more....

After we said goodbye, we started walking back to my car having decided not to go for a coffee afterall. Then we saw One Love (who's been with the band for about 8 years) and the DJ from the club trying to get a cab. If you've watched the Amazing Race and know where I live, you'd know that it is virtually impossible to get a cab here- so they weren't having much luck.

What's a courteous, angelic, kind hearted girl to do in such a situation?

Offer them a lift ofcourse.
They were heading to a club in another suburb so they hopped in and we drove them to there.

But wait, wait, wait, wait there's still more...

We had a great conversation in the car and One Love (who's real name is Spencer) invited us to the after party which we stayed at for about an hour before finally heading home at 4am for some much needed sleep.

The next day (Saturday) I woke up without a voice and realised that I was going to be MCing the whole day on Sunday. Luckily my voice came back by then but I was a little croaky.

The late night/ early morning nearly killed me (I'm getting too old- time to settle down) but it was worth it.

They didn't make it to the fashion parade on Sunday but it didn't matter because they'd already given me so much through their music.

Too exciting

2007-03-15T19:44:00.000-07:00

I'm sooooo excited
Tonight I'm taking my gal pals, Roo and Miss F, to the Arrested Development concert. It's Miss F's birthday next week and I thought dinner and a concert would be the perfect gift for the gal who already has too much of everything else that a gal wants (shoes, bags, belts, etc)

Arrested Development is one of my favourite bands and I can't wait to see them play classics like Tennessee, Mr Wendal, Everyday People, and my favourite, United Minds.

I think I've mentioned before that I live in the most isolated, boring, perochial city in the world and I never ever expected that Arrested Development would come here. Most bands that visit Australia do the East coast (Sydney, Melbourne) and that's it. That means a five hour, $600 flight plus the cost of accomodation and the entry fee if I want to see any big names.

But Arrested Development is here, and I'm going to see them tonight!
Too exciting!

Update on the domestic violence issue

2007-03-13T05:10:00.000-07:00

You'll remember my ranting about a Muslim women's association (otherwise known as Enablers) that had first hand knowledge that a father was abusing his daughters. He had broken the nose of one of them and cause the other to become deaf in one ear by banging her head against the wall. He had held them captive in their bedrooms for 3 weeks and threatened to kill them. He had also threatened to return them to Afghanistan to face the prospect of an arranged marraige or an honor killing.

You'll remember that upon learning of this I advised the association to go to the authorities. You'll remember that the association refused and instead brought in a conservative Imam to speak to the father. You'll remember that I drove to the police station at 9pm one night and filed a report. I informed the authorities. The girls were taken from their father and placed in foster care.

You'll remember that I attended a meeting with the authorities at their request along with a representative from this association of Enablers who defended the father, denied he had done anything wrong and then later called me a Kafir because I suggested that the intergenerational conflicts needed to be addressed by engaging the girls' boyfriends so that they also understand what is going on.

You won't know that I received a copy of the letters the girls had written during their time with their father that detailed every disgusting, degrading and humiliating moment of his abuse. You won't know how much I wept over those letters.

You'll remember that I did not choose to be involved in this situation- but the burden of knowledge was far too much to bear.

Well, the authorities have returned the girls to their father. He has taken them to Afghanistan.

I can only despair.

Polyandry Fatwa

2007-03-13T04:40:00.000-07:00

Like me, you're probably wondering wtf polyandry is.

Well it's the female answer to polygamy. That's right- imagine that ladies- two fragile egos to pander to. I'm just quivering with excitement at the prospect!

The world just gets stranger and stranger- apparently there is a Polyandry fatwa- meaning that us Muslim women who have long been subjected to the humiliating and degrading practice of polygamy may actually be able to get ourselves another hole in the head.

Did I say hole in the head? I meant husband.

Seriously though, I'm all for equal rights- but do two wrongs make a right?

The Polyandry Fatwa

By Mohja Kahf

(AL-TAL, SYRIA) Women in this small Syrian town have had absentee husbands for decades, like women in many other poorer Arab states, where the lack of livable income drives many men abroad in search of work. Now, thanks to improved DNA testing and a fatwa from Syrian ulema that some think will soon be followed by the ulema of other countries, women here have the option of taking a second husband, even if they do not want to divorce the first one.

Polygamy in Islam has traditionally been a male prerogative. The preservation of nasl, or paternity, is cited as the reason why the Quranic verse allowing polygamy for men cannot be assumed to apply in both directions. This has always posed an interpretive problem, since Quranic commandments phrased in the male gender case are not generally assumed to
apply exclusively to men. Many verses commanding prayer and fasting, for example, or detailing how zakat must be distributed, are offered in the male pronoun, but apply equally to women.

With enhanced DNA testing now making it possible for paternity to be determined non-invasively from the moment of conception, in a process accessible to everyone in this socialist state, where all health care services are considered a universal human right, ulema in the small,
Muslim-majority country are relieved to be able to extend the blessing of polygamy to women. The secular government has not played a role in devising the fatwa, but a representative of family court says such marriages will be recognized.

“It solves a real stress that is on our society,” Sheikh Habib-uddin says, as one of the scholars who was instrumental in coordinating the ijma effort. “We have political prisoners who are arrested and never seen again by their wives. We have men who migrate to the Gulf for work, but send paychecks once in a blue moon, and God knows what wives and families they have taken there.”

His own daughter, Carima, was married for four months to her cousin Rafik, in a match that had been arranged and happily celebrated by the two families, when the state police hauled Rafik away for political activism.

“I don’t want to divorce him,” Carima says. “even though my mother and father said that would be okay. He’s my cousin, and I’m fond of him.” She blushes. “He should come out of prison and find an empty room? I can’t do that to Rafik. I should be there for him if he gets out one day. When. When he gets out.” She pauses to wipe the tears that have sprung to her eyes.
“But—I should put my life on hold? Not to be able to build a family of my own? My younger sisters were having babies, and I had none to cradle in my arms.” She cites the example of another woman in the extended family who lived on tenterhooks for twenty-two years because her husband, also a political prisoner, was reported alive by a prisoner who was released. Five
years later he was said to be dead, then alive again. Doubt and hope went on for more than two decades, with prison authorities unwilling to release information.

“Divorce is allowed in such circumstance, of course,” Sheikh Habib says. “But the woman refused it as long as a shred of hope remained.” Finally it became clear that her husband had been executed the first year, in one of the repressive massacres of the Baathist state.

Carima waited three years after Rafik’s arrest before allowing her parents to arrange another marriage for her, to neighborhood shopkeeper Abu Tosheh. She still goes to the authorities with Rafik’s parents at the start of every year to file an inquiry, and meanwhile is pregnant with her first child and glowing.

“This is exactly the sort of difficult dilemma God created polygamy to relieve,” says Muslim Brotherhood representative Aqil Fahim, a Syrian dissident who lived in Riyadh for four decades. “I’ve seen men in the Gulf who are supposed to be there to support wives and children back in Syria, but they end up finding a nice local girl and settling down. What happened to sending money back home?”

More than money is on the mind of Um Wisal, whose husband is one of those deadbeat dads in Riyadh. Abu Wisal’s father and clan were willing to support Um Wisal and her eight children, given the abandonment of their son, who wouldn’t divorce her. Rumor had it, he’d married two women in Saudi, a Moroccan and a Somali. Whenever she sent word asking for a divorce, he’d
wire money, along with the words “Baby, don’t go.” So Um Wisal had no case for divorce on the grounds of non-support, plus the words made her remember his charms. “That was our song,” she says, pulling the edge of her veil over her mouth to hide a smile. “Maybe he’ll come back some day, and we’ll have us some more good times.” She puts her hand on her ample hip and says, “But I wanted a man by my side. A woman needs support in this world. I wanted the
weight of a man.”

She found one, in the hefty shape of a truck driver from Ifrin, Farris al-Youm. Her husband’s clan was furious. They tried to take the children, but she wasn’t divorced from their son, so they couldn’t. “I’m halal married,” she says triumphantly. She sends the children to their father’s
clan after school, at dinnertimes, and for breakfast and lunch on weekends. Asked whether she is a good mother despite her second marriage, she insists that she is; Farris’ driving schedule allows her time to give them plenty of motherly affection, as well as to tend her two goats and to harvest her seven walnut trees.

Advocates of the Polyandry Fatwa insist that it’s not just about sex (really? because who could resist Arab men?). Areej Basaleh (who, with a Ph.D. in Islamic Studies, teaches at Damascus
University’s Islamic College) says it’s about companionship, being a couple, having a mate at the dinner table, for some, while for other women it is also about finding a provider and a protector in a world that is still tilted toward male power (oh yeah- I forgot- we need protectors to keep us in the shadows, otherwise we'd whither away). Others want to balance between family obligations incurred with a first marriage, and personal inclinations addressed by a second spouse. Sometimes the first spouse is mentally instable, or infertile, or brainstem dead, but the wife wants to keep the bond out of loyalty, or for the children or inheritance issues.

And then there is also sexual need, she admits. “Marriage is a sexual outlet, among other social glues it provides.” Some first husbands have prostate problems and cannot take Viagra because of heart conditions, she explains, or simply are unable or unwilling to understand how to bring a
woman to climax, even though her equal right to orgasm is, nominally at least, recognized by Islamic jurisprudence. They want to clamber on top of a woman without the foreplay of “kisses and words” advocated by the Prophet Muhammad. Or they master vaginal sex in one traditional position, but are unwilling to adventure further, leaving her frustrated and bored, staring at the ceiling. Yet other aspects of the marriage may be fine, and the wife may
be willing to stay in the marriage for those reasons, seeing it as cruel and selfish to leave, especially if there are children. She is thus left with a sexual dilemma.

“Marriage is the one place we, as a faith community, do sanction sex, right?” Areej continues. “So it’s supposed to fulfill that natural, God-ordained function, in a context of love and compassion.”

“When it’s not doing so for too many women because the men are not stepping up, something is wrong, and religion should provide a compassionate answer,” says conservative cleric Imam Hamid al-Fahl, who works out at the gym to stay in shape for his wife, and brings her roses on the anniversary of the publication of the book that founded the Shafi’i school of fiqh. “Something
had to be done about all these restless women.” With the Polyandry Fatwa, men will realize that, for the first time in history, there are consequences for such shortcomings, Imam al-Fahl believes. Even those whose wives do not consider the polyandry route will be more motivated to try harder.

Opponents of the Polyandry Fatwa point out that it’s not just for women with absentee first husbands. Women with husbands who are present and accounted for make trouble in the family by marrying over them, they say. Feminists who would rather see polygamy ended all together are not pleased, but polyandry proponents say such activists are just not being realistic.
Christian Syrians in this 15% Christian country say they do not wish to get involved in what they see as a intra-Muslim issue, but privately, some think the Muslims have gone nuts (“We had the good sense to ban all multiple marriages by the third century after our faith started, and anyway we see abstinence as the ideal to strive for; you folks seem to swing the other way”), while others say they were glad to see Muslims finally being fair to women on the multiple marriage thing.

Romantics who insist that marriage means a pairing of two souls meant exclusively for each other are outnumbered by those who say that is a highly individualistic view, contingent on specific economic conditions in other societies. They add that marriage in Syria, rather than being merely an individual act, is a societal institution at the center of a web of complex,
pragmatic roles. Nature can be brought in to support either view, with romantics pointing to the lifelong pairings of monogamous animal species and polygamy advocates noting the proliferation of multiple partners in other species.

Conservative Muslim adversaries of the polyandry ruling, meanwhile, derisively tag it “the Slut Fatwa.” “Only a slut would want to sleep with more than one man,” says Mafini Dam of the Center for the Syrian Family in Damascus. (that's different to the other millions of slut fatwas out there mind you like the 'sew yourself up again slut fatwa', the 'it's ok to kill the slut who dishonored you fatwa' and the 'mutilate the vaginas of the sluts fatwa')

“Case in point, my neighbor Sharifa Izzat,” she says. “She’s got the apartment upstairs with her first man, and an apartment down in the basement with the second one.” There is a rhythmic rattling from the ceiling and Mafini, a widow, puts her hands to her ears. “A’ouzu billah,” she says.

Sharifa Izzat, 35, freshly showered, brushes aside Mafini’s disdain, as she enters the apartment house lobby. Sharifa’s upstairs husband is a respected contractor twelve years older than she, paunchy and bald, “but a dear,” she says, and a good father and provider.

The downstairs spouse is a long-haired starving artist with rugged good looks who takes her dancing on the town and paints loving portraits of her three children (from the first husband) in oils. Seven years younger than she, he made her feel alive after sixteen years of marriage had settled her into a rut. She was not willing to have an affair; it had to be halal and aboveboard. Nothing sordid: a clean, responsible act.

“Each husband satisfies a different side of me. I’m a complex woman in her prime,” Sharifa says brightly, pushing the “down” elevator button. “One for the money, two for the show,” Mafini says of Sharifa’s two husbands, grimacing.

Sharifa is open to the idea of a third husband, “but only if the right man came along.” It would make her life even more complex, she knows, and while her two current husbands have adjusted to each other, a third might change the dynamic. “I’ve always had a soccer player fantasy,” she says with a wink, as the elevator door closes on her. (I think she means soccer team)

Islamic education materials distributed by imams in support of the Polyandry Fatwa remind women that the Quran limits polygamy to four spouses, and that they must be scrupulously fair in dividing their time and attention among them, an ideal men have had a hard time living up to. The pamphlets also note that monogamy continues to be favored implicitly in the Quran. Most
Muslims, says Shaikh Habib, historically have been monogamous, and polygamy has been limited to small numbers in society, even if the spotlight often falls on those few. And most Muslims, he believes, will continue to be monogamous.

“But it’s nice to have options,” his daughter Carima adds.

One for Halal Hippie

2007-03-02T10:28:00.000-08:00

I got this interesting article by email.
Food for thought!

Imagery in Islam

BY AMIR TAHERI
There is no Quranic injunction against images, whether of Muhammad or anyone else. When it spread into the Levant, Islam came into contact with a version of Christianity that was militantly iconoclastic. As a result some Muslim theologians, at a time when Islam still had an organic theology, issued "fatwas" against any depiction of the Godhead. That position was further buttressed by the fact that Islam acknowledges the Jewish Ten Commandments--which include a ban on depicting God--as part of its heritage. The issue has never been decided one way or another, and the claim that a ban on images is "an absolute principle of Islam" is purely political. Islam has only one absolute principle: the Oneness of God. Trying to invent other absolutes is, from the point of view of Islamic theology, nothing but sherk, i.e., the bestowal on the Many of the attributes of the One.

The claim that the ban on depicting Muhammad and other prophets is an absolute principle of Islam is also refuted by history. Many portraits of Muhammad have been drawn by Muslim artists, often commissioned by Muslim rulers. There is no space here to provide an exhaustive list, but these are some of the most famous:
A miniature by Sultan Muhammad-Nur Bokharai, showing Muhammad riding Buraq, a horse with the face of a beautiful woman, on his way to Jerusalem for his M'eraj or nocturnal journey to Heavens (16th century); a painting showing Archangel Gabriel guiding Muhammad into Medina, the prophet's capital after he fled from Mecca (16th century); a portrait of Muhammad, his face covered with a mask, on a pulpit in Medina (16th century); an Isfahan miniature depicting the prophet with his favorite kitten, Hurairah (17th century); Kamaleddin Behzad's miniature showing Muhammad contemplating a rose produced by a drop of sweat that fell from his face (19th century); a painting, "Massacre of the Family of the Prophet," showing Muhammad watching as his grandson Hussain is put to death by the Umayyads in Karbala (19th century); a painting showing Muhammad and seven of his first followers (18th century); and Kamal ul-Mulk's portrait of Muhammad showing the prophet holding the Quran in one hand while with the index finger of the other hand he points to the Oneness of God (19th century).

Some of these can be seen in museums within the Muslim world, including the Topkapi in Istanbul, and in Bokhara and Samarkand, Uzbekistan, and Haroun-Walat, Iran (a suburb of Isfahan). Visitors to other museums, including some in Europe, would find miniatures and book illuminations depicting Muhammad, at times wearing his Meccan burqa (cover) or his Medinan niqab (mask). There have been few statues of Muhammad, although several Iranian and Arab contemporary sculptors have produced busts of the prophet. One statue of Muhammad can be seen at the building of the U.S. Supreme Court, where the prophet is honored as one of the great "lawgivers" of mankind.

There has been other imagery: the Janissaries--the elite of the Ottoman army--carried a medallion stamped with the prophet's head (sabz qaba). Their Persian Qizilbash rivals had their own icon, depicting the head of Ali, the prophet's son-in-law and the first Imam of Shiism. As for images of other prophets, they run into millions. Perhaps the most popular is Joseph, who is presented by the Quran as the most beautiful human being created by God.

Progressive Islam

2007-02-28T18:58:00.000-08:00

I've been prompted by some of the comments to write this post about Progressive Islam (Racoon, I hope this answers some of your questions.)

First of all, let's examine some home truths:

Islam has fractured into a number of Sects (2 Sunni schools of thought, 6 Shia sects, 6 Sufi orders, 2 Kharajite sects, 4 Kalam schools, 7 movements within Sects including Salafism and Wahabbism and 8 other sects). All this despite the Quran (6:159, 10:19) prohibiting Sectarianism.
Sects differ according to the Hadith and Sunnah (sayings and doings of the Prophet), not according to belief in the Quran as the word of God and the Prophet Mohammed (pbuh) as his Messenger nor according to the 5 Pillars of Islam (prayer, alms, pilgrimage, shahada, fasting during Ramadan)
As most of you will know Hadith and Sunnah were incorporated many years after the death of the Prophet among them some which were considered spurious.
Thus, Islamic scholars compiled a list of what they considered authentic Hadith that could be validated- known as Sahih resulting in 6 collections of Hadith of which Bukhari and Muslim are most quoted.
Hadith authentication was mainly based on isnad- the chain of authority from which they originated. Authentication was not based on analysis of the Hadith itself and whether or not it could, logically, be considered something the Prophet would have actually said or done.
Over centuries Hadith have come to be the principle source of information on how to practice Islam for the majority of Muslims. They have been manipulated and distorted by Muslim clergy and politicians such that the actions of the Taliban, the oppression of women, the killing of innocent lives have all been justifiable through a distortion of Hadith.

Progressive Muslims vary in their level of acceptance of Hadith. Generally speaking, all Progressive Muslims believe that the Hadith has come to replace the Quran as the main source of knowledge for Muslims and that this constitutes a breach of Quranic edicts. All Progressive Muslims advocate for the absolute authority of the Quran and refute the growing authority of Hadith. All Progressive Muslims believe that Islam has lost its way and that the majority of Muslims focus on superficial symbols of religiousity (what is Halal or Haram, to pluck one's eyebrows or not; to have a dog or not; to adorn your house with statues or not- and other such stupidity) in Hadith rather than turning to the principle source of guidance- the Quran.

On one end of the spectrum are those Progressives who completely dismiss all Hadith on the basis that sectarianism is against the teachings in the Quran and has arisen out of Hadith- hence all Hadith must be dismissed. Some can be quite over the top.

There are ofcourse other much more complex arguments about leadership and what exactly constitutes "the message" that Muslims are obliged to obey- but I'm not going to get that deep into it here- maybe another time.

There are also those Progressives who believe that the Hadith must not be accepted at face value and that it must be interpreted according to actual content (remember Hadith was only interpreted according to the line of authority) and according to the context of the day.

Some Hadith actually contradict Quranic edicts- particularly those in relation to the status of women and some have no basis and cannot be validated in the Quran (eg hijab- not in the Quran, only in Hadith and according to which sect you follow might mean anything from a scarf over the hair to a complete covering of face and hands).

Where do I sit?

Well, as you will probably know from reading my blog, I have a lot of problems with the way Islam is practiced today. It seems to me all the disunity among Muslims comes from different interpretations of Hadith. When I ask someone to show me where, in the Quran, Muslims are not allowed to celebrate birthdays, or keep dogs, or pluck their eyebrows, or have statues- they direct me to Hadith. Why? Because it's not in the Quran. These people are actually placing Hadith above Quran as authoritative text!

I don't think that all Hadith should be dismissed but I do strongly believe that God has given each and every one of us the ability to think for ourselves. Through the Quran, God has also charged us to learn, educate ourselves and become better people. Is not plucking my eyebrows going to make me a better person? Is killing innocent Jews and Christians going to make me a better person? Is blowing myself up into a million pieces going to make me a better person? It sounds ludicrous doesn't it- but this is what Islam has become- the illogical, the ludicrous, the ugly!

We teach our kids to recite Quran, we praise those who become Hafeez (memorised the entire Quran) and give Masha'Allah to 8 year olds who can recite Surat Yassin in full. But do we teach them what it means? Do we guide them in applying it to their lives? No we don't- instead we admonish them with "haram" and "ayb".

Imam baqir (the 6th successor of the Prophet), said that the Quran is like an ocean, where everyone benefits from it..... The young pick up pebbles and shells from close to the shore, wehreas the older (advanced) search out the depths of it for it's pearls.

I can be like the majority of Muslims and stand from afar gazing at the Ocean and occassionally admiring its beauty but never really fathoming this wondrous creation.

I can be like the majority of Muslims and sit on the shore line accepting second hand shells discarded by those who know better but never venturing into the ocean, never allowing myself to be overcome by its beauty.

I want to find my own pearls. I want to experience the beauty of the ocean in all its glory. I want to search for truth, for beauty.

Happy GLP Day everyone

2007-02-26T17:51:00.000-08:00

Who needs a Sharia divorce court in Australia?

2007-02-22T01:03:00.000-08:00

Yes, yes, I know it's been a while but I've been flat out like a lizard drinking.

I'm finishing up my office job this week and taking 8 months extended leave to finish my PhD so naturally everyone wants everything yesterday.

I've been in this job for 5 years and, while I'm relieved that I can finally only focus on one thing, I must say I'm feeling a bit sad about going. I'm in a fairly senior position in Government with fairly close access to the head of state. What's been good about this is that I'm often the one who gets to brief the head of state about issues like this little beauty:

Muslim leaders call for Sharia divorce court

Now the last time this little issue raised its ugly head in 2005 I wrote a four page briefing on why it's all a load of crappola and advised the pollies not to touch it with a barge pole.
You see the real issue behind all of this hoo ha is that some charming men are using the fact that they were married under Sharia as a reason to deny a divorce to their wives while they happily go about life rooting like rabbits, marrying 2 or more (the more the merrier) and living a horny over-sexed, testosterone laden life in full control of all their monetary (and other- albeit probably quite small and useless) assets.
So the women, (because they are incapable of thinking for themselves), believing that they need to have a Sharia divorce because they have a Sharia marraige, either don't file for a divorce through the courts (where they can also be granted half of everything) or else agree to go to a Muslim country in order to obtain a Sharia divorce.
Even where the women have attained a legal divorce through the Australian courts, some still do not feel that they are "properly divorced".

And that's the crux of it- THEY DO NOT FEEL DIVORCED- nothing at all to do with actual divorced status or legal rights or anything remotely logical!

I have personal experience here. I can't tell you the number of times my ex tried to pull the whole "well you can get a legal divorce if you like but you will still be 'ala zemetti' because we were married in Egypt under Sharia" thing on me- and, sad to say, he almost had me there for a while.
That is until I discovered and became involved with a group of Progressive/ Modernist Muslims who do not believe that Sharia is a Quranic edict, that none of Sharia is found in the Quaran and that many Sharia laws practiced in certain Muslim countries actually violate Quranic edicts.

The real issue then is not the need for a Sharia divorce court- it's the need for a CHANGE OF THINKING and a realisation that Sharia is not the solution for everything (it is infact quite the opposite).

And that is precisely what I'll be advising this time around.

But what happens when I leave this place?
I don't want to think about it!

Things you don't know about me

2007-02-15T02:37:00.000-08:00

Tagged by Mumbo

1. I have a shameless love of free stuff- I will take anything if it is for free- I mean anything. And I have the garish pink lipgloss, blue mascara, green eyeliner, crappy hair products, hotel slippers, little bottles of shampoo, conditioner and shower gel, logo t-shirts and caps and oversized sunglasses to prove it. I have never worn or used any of them- but who cares- they were FREE!!!

2. I hate massages. Hate, hate, hate, hate, hate them. I can't bear for anyone to touch my back, my neck or my feet. It sends a chill up my spine and makes me cringe.

3. I don't do pink. Ever. OK, maybe once or twice- but I was forced to!

4. Unlike Mumbo- I am addicted to horror movies. I love them. I'm one of those losers who goes to the cinema by myself. It's not because I don't have friends- it's just that they would all prefer to see some shmaltzy boo hoo pass the tissues sooky sooky la la romantic comedy (bunch of girlies!)

5. I am Australia's worst road rager. Every morning my work colleagues are subjected to a vitriolic diatribe about how bad EVERY BODY ELSE drives. I have been known to follow people who did not do the 'Thankyou wave' when I have let them in (don't laugh- the thank you wave is right up there in terms of driver etiquette).

6. On more than one occassion a man has called me intimidating. Imagine! Me? Intimidating! Bloody little wussy sooky sooky la la scaredy cats pee in your pants want my mama run like a girlie girl got no balls losers!

7. I have an amaaaaazing propensity to attract freaks, stalkers and weirdos- especially on public transport and at conferences. One guy professed his love for me after 5 minutes of knowing me (yeah- I'm going to run off and marry you because you googled me- STALKER), another I sat next to on a plane tried to invite me to a mass orgy (yeah, I'm going to join you and your fat n' over 40 friends in black leather masks and fluro pink g-strings for some 'real fun'- WEIRDO), when I was 8 months pregnant, I guy I sat next to on a bus begged me to allow him to come to the birth (yeah, I want YOU there while I'm lying there in agony with my legs up in stirrups- FREAK) Life is just one big adventure!

8. I love roller coasters and any kind of ride that takes you to the edge of bringing up your breakfast. But I'm afraid to get on escalators- in case I fall and hurt myself.

9. I love birds- they are my favourite animals. But I'm scared of chickens (chickens are not birds- they don't fly- the evil little buggers!)

and finally....

10. I don't look like anyone- and, to be honest, I feel like I'm missing out on something! Occasionally I've been told that I look like Halle Berry and at other times like Victoria Beckham (eww!!) in a photo but nobody ever says "wow you look just like...". My husband looks like Nicholas Cage and always gets told that- Not fair, I want to be told too!

I'm tagging Raccooooooon, Queen and Path 2 Hope. And I want Howie and Egypeter to tell us all some thing we don't know about them- and it better be good, juicy stuff that we can get our teeth into!

Epilogue

2007-02-10T00:12:00.000-08:00

I want to thank everyone who left comments on my story.
Your words really touched my heart. You see, I've held this secret for almost 20 years now and lived with the guilt and shame of what happened. That is why I have never told- I wrapped the story in guilt and shame and hid it in the back of my mind.

What happened back then was the start of a long and hard journey. There were many many more times when I would feel the stinging aftermath of my father's hand across my face and the pain of my mother's biting degradations- my adamance for choosing my own path made me the black sheep; the 'wild child'. Ofcourse my uncanny aptitude for choosing the "wrong" men did not help- my first true love was Coptic Egyptian- as it happened he was not just the "wrong" religion but also the wrong class- his parents threatened to cut him out of their will and stop his allowance if he continued to see me- our relationship ended soon after. But not before his mum rang my mum and exposed our ilicit romance.

It also did not help that I am the first woman in my ENTIRE family (that's about 100 people if I was to bother to actually sit down and count) to ever get divorced and the only woman in my entire family to marry a khawaga (gringo).

With those kinds of credentials, is it any wonder that my life has been one long battle to escape the shadows?

Part 3- The Final

2007-02-04T05:46:00.000-08:00

I read an article in the newspaper yesterday about a small village in Pakistan that had lost a lot of its young men to suicide missions thanks to an Al Qaida recruiting program. The fathers of these young men were talking about how proud they were- how honoured they felt that their sons had sacrificed their own lives for some warped ideology- how they had earned the respect of the entire village and were regarded with esteem as the honourable fathers of martyrs.

It strikes me that some people think that honour is all they have in this world. They hold honour so dear yet they do little to honour themselves, instead placing their own honour in the hands of others. Where is honour if not in your own heart? Why must people die so that others can claim honour? If death is indeed honour, then I choose life.

I will never know exactly what it was that made my father stop himself that night. Perhaps the sight of his own hands closing around my throat as I struggled for breath, reminded him of how they had once guided mine: "Bishwish, Bishwish- softly, softly. Tenderly ya habibti. You are not painting a wall. Paint from the heart. From your heart, to your brush, to your canvas. Let the paintbrush capture your feeling."

Perhaps in that instant- that millisecond when time stood still, he released his grip and allowed the breath to once again enter my body- he had realised what honour really is.

From that point on I became "she", "her", "that girl", "the tainted one", "el bet di". When I tried to speak to my mother she told me that I was no longer her daughter. My father left the room whenever I entered. I became a ghost. I was alive, but in their minds I was dead. How ironic that the consequences of my actions should be that I became an outsider even in the shadows.

Determined to do well in my final school year, I threw myself into my studies. I studied 10 hours each day, everyday, emerging from my room only for bathroom breaks and to eat. Oddly enough, this kind of diversion therapy has helped me get through some rough patches in my life. Years later when I separated from my first husband, I started a Masters degree by Thesis and finished in less than a year. When my boyfriend (now husband) and I broke up, I would divert my attention by immersing my self in home based projects. Had it not been for the fact that we broke up about 5 times during our courtship, the rooms in my house would have remained bare and unpainted.

Occassionally I wandered into my sister's old bedroom. Dr Dickhead, deciding that Australia was a land of painted hussies where a good little Muslim wife could easily be led astray, took my sister to Egypt where she embarked on a life as the good Doctor's coffee machine and baby making factory. I would sit on her bed and the room would come alive with memories of the two of us listening to music, arguing over whether the members of Duran Duran were gay, laughing with glee as we imagined Dr Dickhead's penis as a pale pink flacid appendange no bigger than a peanut dangling helplessly between his thunderous thighs, and squeeling with delight as we found new and even more disgusting ways to degrade him.

My parents kept a close eye on me. They quit full time work so that one of them could be home at all hours to watch me. If I missed the train and took a later one, I would find them waiting for me at the train station questioning why I was 10 minutes late. They regularly raided my room searching for any incriminating evidence that I might have found a way to evade their close surveilance and sneak off at night to fuck a football team (or two). If my period was late, as it often was, my mother would march me down to the clinic to draw blood for a pregnancy test. There were no school excursions, no outings, no extracurricular activities, no acting classes, no debating team, no friends, nothing. Only the shadows and school.

One day my mother told me to get dressed as I had an appointment with a doctor. "But I'm not sick" I protested. As it turned out, this was not the kind of doctor you go to if you're sick.

As we sat in the doctor's office, my mother went through my medical history- tonsils out at five, no major illnesses, no major surgery.... Then she leaned towards the doctor the way people do when they are about to say something shocking and life changing and whispered "Doctor, she is not a virgin." The doctor sat back looked at my mother and then at me and, with a slight grin, responded "So what?". After about 10 minutes it was settled. I would go in for surgery the next week.

I was to be re-virginated. Born again as a pure, untainted, unsniffed rose. I was to reclaim my virginity, re-instate my hymen to its once glorious status as protector of my virtue. I was to become marraigable material- a fine and beautiful virgin for would be Dr Dickheads.

I was angry but I had no choice. What options were there for me? I could run away but what about school, my exams, my dreams of studying law? I was not willing to give that up- that dream was the only control I had over my own life now. I could refuse to have the surgery but what good would that do? It would only serve to incur my parents wrath even more. No. I had to go along with this, even if I strongly believed that your experiences make you who you are and that nobody should ever force you to erase part of yourself.

As the school year neared to an end and I prepared to take my final exams, my parents revealed their plans for the new, improved, re-virginated me. I was to go to Egypt with my mother where I would stay with my widowed Aunt and cousins (whom I had never met) in Cairo. Ofcourse if I wanted to come back to Australia when University started the next year I could, but I would spend at least 4 months there. I was not fooled by their false assurances, not convinced that they would suddenly hand me back control of my life and allow me to step out of the shadows. I was to leave the day after my final exam.

And so the path winds it way and leads us places we never imagined we would go. And we let it because we made that initial choice, we took that initial step and threw ourselves at the mercy of destiny. And now we cannot move- not left, not right, not back, not forward- we only go where the path takes us. We watch helplessly as the scenery changes around us and we are forced to change with it. All the while desperately yearning for a path that is our own.

My parents rang me from Australia the day my final results arrived. I'd done well and was offered a place at Sydney University's Law Faculty, my first choice. But it didn't matter anymore. That dream belonged to a different life, a different path. I had to let it go if I was ever going to regain control. I had to embrace the reality of my new life and forge a new path. And I did.

There. It's done. I've told it. The secret that's lived in the dark places of my mind for so many years. The memories that make up my third life- the life I really have. Now I've released them from the shadows and brought them to the light.

Part 2

2007-02-01T07:15:00.000-08:00

His name was Wayne (I know- sounds like a stupid name now but, trust me, it was a cool name back then). He was in his final year at a private boys college which would have made him 17 years old. He was blonde, blue eyed and a surfer- everything I thought I would never have.

I knew, with all my heart and every cell in my brain, I knew that after that night he would pretend he didn't know me. I knew but I didn't care. For one night he did want to be with me. For one night he looked at me as he looked at all those other girls. For one night, I could know what it felt like to not be different.

So I took that step. I plunged actually- full on- head first- no thinking. The next day my friend's mother took a photo of my friend and I together. Two 15 year old girls in jeans and sneakers and matching pink t-shirts. I looked so different- so changed. It was quite striking actually and i felt my face redden as I imagined that everybody else could see what I could see. I imagined that strangers were looking at me and seeing this change and knowing what I had done.

As I write this now it sounds so silly and immature-embarrassing almost. I keep telling myself "what were you thinking" and I have to remind myself that I am not writing this as I am now- but as I was then- as a 15 year old girl, not as a grown woman with the clarity of hindsight who has learnt to love herself and who, for a long time now, has found her place and embraced her difference.

I told only one person. I told my sister. It only felt natural that I should- we shared everything- our hopes, our dreams, our secret crushes, our mad passionate love for the members of KISS. Her reaction was neither here nor there- or perhaps I just didn't see it. She did not judge, she only asked "why?" and I said "because he wanted me". That was it- nothing more was said of it. She wasn't curious as to what happened, what it felt like, how it happened, if it hurt- nothing. She only wanted to know why and then she walked away.

Then he arrived. The stranger. The son of one of my mother's friends from Egypt. A doctor, no less. My mother made it clear that she hoped one of us would please him enough that he would approach my father and seek marraige. For months I put up with his obnoxious presence. I hated him- he was rude and arrogant. Once he asked me to make him a cup of coffee and I told him that I hadn't noticed that he did not have legs and arms to do it himself. Perhaps, I suggested, he was a doctor who did not know how to make a simple cup of coffee? My mother took me aside and scolded me like she had never before- it was like I had insulted her.

My sister and I would lock ourselves away in her bedroom whenever he was around and make fun of him, laughing all the while at the ridiculous thought of either of us marrying Dr Dickhead.

Despite my obvious distaste for the man, he approached my father and requested his permission to marry me. Was he mad? Did he honestly think I would willingly marry him and submit myself to a life of depravation and oppression- a life of making endless cups of coffee at his beck and call. I protested loud and clear but I didn't need to because my parents weren't interested in forcing me into marraige. Besides that, I had just turned 17 and was entering my final year of school with plans to become Sydney's top criminal lawyer.

One night, my mother was looking especially pleased with herself. Dr Dickhead had decided that my sister was agreeable enough to be his wife. And she had said yes.

My sister was getting married- to Dr Dickhead no less. As much as I tried to be happy for her, if this was indeed what she wanted for herself, I could not fathom why on earth she would make such a choice. She had told me she hated him, had led me to believe that she would not ever conceive of marrying him. I kept my reservations and concerns to myself and tried my hardest to support my sister (she is still married to Dr Dickhead and I still hate him).

Then it happened. Why wouldn't it? I had been kidding myself all along thinking that my actions did not have consequences- thinking that I could control my own destiny. The path was winding its way along and there was no stopping now.

My parents were visiting my sister at her new home. For some reason I was restless and sleep did not come easily that night. I couldn't explain why but I was overcome by an uneasy feeling- a feeling of impending doom or sorrow or something ugly and dark.

When my parents arrived with my sister and her husband that night they headed straight for my bedroom- my mother screaming like a woman in the throes of childbirth:

"Where is she? Where is the girl? She's not a virgin. She's not a virgin."

I looked to my sister for some kind of explanation, without any emotion she looked straight at me and said "I told them everything".

Why? Why? Why would she do that? Why would she betray me like that?

The moments that followed are hard to express- there was a lot of noise, a lot of commotion, a lot of screaming. I could not take in what was going on around me- the tears, the yelling, the occassional fist in my stomach and kicks to my side, the frequent slaps, the insults, the degradation- it all seemed a million miles away, like it was happening to someone else in some alternate universe and yet it was happening, it was happening to me.

All the while I just stood there- not moving, not flinching- my eyes fixed only on one thing, one person, my sister. I tried to speak but my voice made no sound so I looked at her and mouthed the word that was consuming every thought in my mind: 'why?'. She never answered.

I can imagine now how the conversation might have gone that night. My sister had just received notification of her high school leaving score- she hadn't passed. I can imagine my parents sitting there, facing my sister and her new husband across the table and saying something like "Thank Allah she got married because she's failed high school- she's not like her sister you know- her sister is the smart one- her sister...her sister...her sister".

I can imagine that my sister would then have broken her silence, that all the years of pent up resentment would have rushed forth and exploded as they had wanted to so many times before: "You think she's an angel? You think she's perfect? Wait till you hear what she is really like."

The screams grew louder. My mother was inconsolable. She was hysterical. And my father?My father kept his head down afraid to look at me. Perhaps he wanted to keep that image of his little girl for as long as he could- even if it was just a few moments longer.

Having rid themselves of their initial reactions of rage, my parents took me into their bedroom, locked the door and began the inquisition. Who was I with? What was his name? When did it happen? How many times had I done it? What else had I been hiding? A million, zillion, trillion questions.

Then a period of calm. Like the eye of a storm.

Quiet, peace, silence.

Were they done? Was it over? I started to come back to reality- to feel the pain in my head and stomach and the bruises on my legs.

Then the storm raged again.

"She has dishonoured us."
"She does not deserve to live"
"She needs to die"
"We must kill her"

And my father's hands- those hands that once had gently caressed me, those hands that had introduced me to the joy of art, the wonders of Gaugin and Chagall and had nurtured my love of painting.

My father's hands gripped my throat.

I'm sorry. I have to stop now. I promise I will write Part 3 soon.

Memorable Moments #2

2007-02-01T06:13:00.000-08:00

This one is going to take a while so please bear with me.
It's a long story but it is a story that I promised myself I would write a long time ago. Until now, it just didn't want to be written...

We, my brother, sister and I, grew up as typical Sydney wogs. By that I mean that our parents as immigrants to a new land, worked long hours to make ends meet and I was often left only in the company of my siblings. This explains why I never learnt to speak Arabic until later in life.

My sister and I were close. We're only about 18 months apart in age (she's older) and, with our parents often working shifts, we spent most of our time together and were often mistaken for twins. As we grew older our personalities and interests developed in different directions but the bond we developed as young girls remained strong. I had an inquisitive mind and would spend my time reading and studying. Not surprisingly, I excelled academically. My sister was a dreamer who would rather spend her days lounging in the sun and listening to music. She exasperated my parents, who placed a strong value on education, with her average performance at school. While I often won their approval with my glowing reports and perfect marks.

It was not that I tried to overshadow my sister or to make her look bad. It was just that I had found something that I enjoyed and that I was good at. My biggest regret is that I never noticed the pain in my sister's eyes whenever my parents yelled at her "why can't you be more like your sister".

When we started high school, my parents insisted on sending us to a posh Anglican ladies college. I didn't belong there among the girls with their shiny blonde hair that glistened in the sun. I, with my dark curls, dark eyes and dark skin which I wore like a hideous birthmark. They with their perky breasts, lean hips and big houses in Sydney's upper class suburbs. I with my breasts already so large that they strained against my school uniform, my round hips and parents with thick accents and middle class jobs. Oh how I longed to be like them. To start each school week with exciting stories of parties and boys, a first kiss, a first date. How I longed to be a part of their world.

It's not that I was unpopular. My penchant for acting, my class antics and my academic achievements made me very popular at school- but I was always an outsider. My parents were very traditional and I was not permitted to attend parties or outings with the girls from school. I would never, not in a million years, get to experience what they experienced. My world was the shadows. Theirs was the light.

We maintained Muslim traditions in our household- we always fasted Ramadan and celebrated Eid- but my parents never taught me what it meant to be Muslim or what was expected of me. I knew one Surah- the Fatiha- which my father taught me when I was 10 and one Arabic song- Mama Zamanha Gaya- which I remembered from my early years (funny how we all seem to have one song that stays with us through life). Apart from that, I knew nothing else of what it meant to be Egyptian or Muslim- I only knew that it was what I was expected to be.

As time wore on my parents softened a little in their strict restrictions on me, mainly as a result of my sister's insistence- the elder child must always pave the way and the younger ones must always enjoy the fruits of that labour.

The year I turned 15 was uneventful in most respects. I was in year 9 (Junior High) and was starting to enjoy some level of freedom. I attended a few school parties where I got to know some of the boys from the neighbouring schools. We were friends but they would never entertain the thought of seeing me as anything more than that. I was too different- and when you're a teenager, different isn't what you want to be. No, they reserved their affections for the girls who were like them.

You know how sometimes you make a conscious choice to do something and you have no idea where the consequences will lead you? You kind of take one step along a path and then it is like you are at the mercy of destiny and nothing you do can change your path- you can't go back but you can't go forward either because it is not you who is in control anymore. One night I made a conscious decision. I stepped onto a path without giving a single thought to where it might lead. I saw a way that I could be like them- like those girls- even if just for one night- and I took it.

The real reason my kids think I'm cool...

2007-01-30T21:17:00.000-08:00

... is that my friends look like this:

PS: I'm the handsome one!

Why is this happening?

2007-01-29T04:52:00.000-08:00

I've just watched a television interview (I've linked it here) with Wassim Doureihi the young spokesman for Hizb ut Tahrir in Australia.

The group, clearly an Islamist organisation with strongly wahabi influenced views, is running a conference right here, right in Australia, where the guest speaker Ismail Yusanto from Indonesia went on about the responsibility of every Muslim to undertake training and fight the 'enemy'.

Doureihi defended Yusanto's calls to arms stating that Muslims needed to prepare for the return of the Caliphate and that it was the duty of all Muslims to learn self defence in the case of an "agressive" attempt by the enemy against Muslims- he used Iraq as an example. Hmmm- funny that he doesn't mention the acts of agression by Muslims against Muslims- perhaps he has not heard of Darfur.

My question is...
What the fuck is the Australian Government doing? If the Egyptians can manage to keep a fairly tight lid on extremists to the point that people like Zawahri have to flee Egypt and head to Afghanistan; to the point that Islamists have actually called on the UNHCR to assist them seek asylum in countries like the UK and France because the Egyptian government does not allow them to breathe- then what on earth is the Australian government doing allowing them to come here and attempt to steal the minds of our young with their warped ideologies?

What am I supposed to do as a mother of young boys to protect them and ensure that they do not succumb to the mindset of the extremists when my own government won't lift a finger?

This is just ridiculous. How can this be allowed. If Yusanto and Doureihi want to blow themselves up because they have some kind of warped idea that Allah wants this from us- then go right ahead- do it- blow your own fuckin brains out and have a great time as you head to straight to hell in a bucket. BUT LEAVE US ALONE. LEAVE OUR CHILDREN ALONE.

Honestly, I just don't know what to do anymore. How do you fight something like this? How? When is the Australian government going to realise that dealing with terrorism is not just about 3D blast modelling and CTV and identity cards and police raids- it's about winning hearts and minds. It's about stealing back from the jihadis what they stole from us- peace, harmony, the beauty of Islam, and the minds of thousands of dead young men who believed in their "jihad".

My Big News

2007-01-29T04:32:00.000-08:00

I have just accepted an invitation to teach a 3rd year unit at the University. The topic is....

Sex and Intimacy in Cinema

The coordinator said that she had heard about my interactive style of teaching and thought that I would be perfect for this unit. Not quite sure what she meant by that! In any case, it sure will be an interesting semester!

I decided to share my big news with my family- husband (H), 16 yr old son (B1), 14 year old son (B2) and slightly younger step son (B3) over dinner tonight. Little did I know that the conversation would end like this...

Me: So... I've been invited to teach a special elective unit at the Uni. It's on Sex and Intimacy in Cinema.

B1: Sounds like a fancy shmancy term for PORN

Me: Where do you learn these things?

H: Ha ha ha, 'porn', that's a good one!
*high 5s B1 and they laugh their stupid 'we are the masters of the universe' laugh*

B1: So Mum will you have teach them about the clitoris?

B2: What's a clitoris?

B3: Yeah what's a clitoris? We saw it on Southpark. It's a big huge pink thing that looks like a hat.

Me: It's not huge OK. Where do you learn these things? Who's letting you watch Southpark?

H: ha ha ha, Southpark, yeah that was funny.

B2: Yeah and it has magical powers or something. What is it Dad?

Me: Don't ask him, he doesn't know.

H: *shoots me a look and suddenly gets all serious*
Well boys... when you have sex...

B3: Ewww gross. I'm getting out of here

B1: Man, our family put the 'DIS' in disfunctional

Me: No son. Our family put the 'FUNK' in disfunctional

So much for my big news!

Egyptian Mum Part 2- The Sex Talk

2007-01-17T17:37:00.000-08:00

One day, while chopping carrots, it suddenly dawned on me that I had been remiss in my motherly duties and had neglected the ritualistic sex talk which all parents must endure at some time in their lives:

Suddenly overcome by an urgent sense of parental responsibility, I ran upstairs to where B1, B2 and B3 were playing...

Me: Ummm...boys do you need me to give you the sex talk?

Boys: No Mum, we know everything

B2: Yeah, we know about the penis and the vagina

B1: *giggles like a little girl* You said vagina

Me: Cool, then my work here is done *moon walks out of the room*

OK. So maybe I didn't do too well on the whole sex talk thing. But it's not like I had a good role model....

Egyptians love analogies. They have an analogy for everything. Nothing is what it is, it is always what it is like- men are like walls, women are like cat meat- you get the picture. Not surprising really when you consider what a flowery language Arabic is compared to English.

Consequently, my Mum's version of the sex talk did not involve a penis, or a vagina or birds and bees. In fact my Mum's sex talk did not involve sex at all:

" A woman is like a flower. The first time a man smells a flower, it
smells so lovely. He wants to keep smelling it. But the more he
smells flower the less he can smell until he can no longer smell
the flower and then he doesn't want it anymore and he
looks for another flower."

I first got the sex talk when I "became a woman". Until I got married, the sex talk was an annual event- always the same, never wavering. Without fail, my mother would sit me down and repeat the sex talk word for word (and she NEVER moon walked out of the room when she finished- that was my little innovation!)

I could be forgiven for thinking that I was actually getting a lesson in the fine art of flower arranging, or that sex was something that involved sniffing or that my mother's sex talk was an, albeit obscure, caveat against unpleasant body odour.

It did, infact, take me quite a few years to decipher my mother's coded message about sexual relations between a man and a woman. But by then it was too late... I'd already been sniffed and discarded in favour of another more beautiful flower with an alluring and hedonistic perfume that no man could resist.

My mother's analogy is not completely lost. With a few minor amendments I could really make it work. How's this:

Life is like a rose bush. Watch out for all the pricks!

*moon walks out of the room*

Getting Old

2007-01-15T20:39:00.000-08:00

My son started shaving this week. Add to that the fact that he is at least 15 cm taller than me, wears a monstrous size 11 shoe and can stay up longer than me at night- it's official- he is now a man. Which makes me the mother of a man, which makes me old!

So what do I do now?

Do I start wearing purple?
Do I adjust my car seat so that I'm sitting up against the windscreen when I drive?
Do I abandon any hope of perfect abs and shapely arms and instead take pride in the way my upper arms flap in the wind when I wave goodbye?
Do I hang up my stilletos and start wearing ugly flat shoes?
Do I talk about "my day" as if it was 100 years ago?
Do I start carrying around one of those wheelie shopping bags with pink flowers on them?
Do I start wearing three layers of clothing even in the heat of summer so my kidneys won't catch cold?
Do I throw out my sexy lingerie and buy myself some nanna knickers in a sensible beige?
Do I take a belly dancing class so that I can get in touch with my inner vagina?

BUT WAIT... wait just a minute... I don't FEEL old...

I'm still in my thirties
I still have body issues
I still get pimples
I still check my butt and thighs in the mirror everymorning for cellulite
I still complain about how long it takes to do my hair and how much product I need to make it look decent
I still can't apply eyeshadow correctly
I still have at least 5 different mascaras in my makeup bag of which at least 2 are waaaay past their use by
I can still pass the pencil test ;) (ladies- you know what I'm talking about)
I still get hit on by foetuses (ie younger men)
I still catch up with the girls every Friday to talk about men and their appendages

So... when am I officially over the hill?

Memorable Moments #1- The Day my Boys Reconnected with their Father

2007-01-14T18:44:00.000-08:00

I separated from my first husband when my two sons were just 3 and 1 years old. It was not a happy marraige. Having reached the age of 21 and thinking that I knew everything, I naively got married despite many of my friends warning against it. My parents were happy though, relieved that their 'wild child' was choosing to settle down. It lasted 6 years.

For the first year or so after we separated he kept in contact with the boys. He still pulled his usual tricks- promising to take them out and then not showing up- leaving me to comfort and console their tiny little hearts. Then he moved to Sydney. He still sent birthday presents and cards but within a year he had stopped all contact.

Many times I tried to contact him, to find him and let him know that his son had had major surgery, that his other son was top of his class, that I worried about the bullying at school, that his son, at just age 7, had read his first novel in 2 days- but to no avail. I was a struggling single Mum (he has never paid a single cent in maintanence) but I managed to scrimp and save for a private investigator to try to find him. No luck.

So I brought up my boys as best I could and, despite their Mum, they are fine young men who make me proud. My eldest is in his final year of school and is set on being a human rights lawyer. The youngest is a math wiz and wants to be a doctor or robotics engineer. But they have seen so much heartache for such young lives.

After 7 years of being on our own with no contact from their father I found my eldest son walking around the house clutching a photo of himself as a baby with his dad. I asked him if he wanted to talk and took him into the bedroom for some privacy. He sat on the edge of the bed silent for a long time until he could no longer hold back his tears. Still clutching the photo of his father he turned to me and asked "Mum, is my dad dead?". My son was just 10 years old but in his eyes I saw a pain that I had seen in lonely old men who had said goodbye to children, friends and family.

To say that it broke my heart is an understatement. It was as if my heart had shattered into a million pieces. I am fighting back the tears just writing this now. I wanted to yell and scream my anger at the man who had caused my babies so much pain, who had left them and forgotten them and refused to share in their achievements, their joys and their sorrows. I wanted to take a knife and find him and pierce his heart a million times for each time he had made them hurt. But instead I smiled at my son, wiped his eyes and said "Son, I don't know where your father is, I have tried to find him and I failed. But I do know that he loves you and your brother very much and that every moment of every day he thinks about you both and that he wishes he were here and that he is very proud of you."

It was the hardest but also the easiest lie I had ever told in my life.

Small miracles do happen. The next morning as if by God's merciful hands, I was woken by a phone call. It was their father. He was coming back to see them and to stay for good. Just like that. Just out of the blue like that. I was skeptical but decided to give him the benefit of the doubt.

The day he arrived, I dressed my beautiful angels, who were now 10 and almost 8 years old, in their best clothes and told them that their father was coming to see them. When his car pulled up in the driveway I went out first to meet him.

I stood there, face to face with the man who once held so much power over me that I thought I would surely die by his hand. No more fear- just rage and anger. "You have hurt these boys so much, you have been the cause of their suffering, you have let them down, you have made them cry. Today you are here and in a minute you will see them again. But I am here now to tell you that if you ever let them down again, if you ever make them cry again, if you ever break their hearts again- you will be dead to them. Do you understand me? I will do everything in my power to make sure that you are dead to them- that you never ever ever see them again and that they forget your name and who you are. Do you understand me?"

The man who once wielded such power, stood helpless, a shadow of the man I had married and shared a bed with and from whom I used to cower in fear. To me he was nothing now.

I went back in the house and got the boys. Clutching their hands tightly for fear that he might once again break their hearts. My eldest, who had memories of his father, immediately recognised him. He let go of my hand and ran into his father's arms, smiling like I had never seen him smile before. But my youngest, my little talkative angel, who was just a baby when his father left stood behind me, clutching my skirt and staring at me with his big beautiful brown eyes, looking bewildered and confused. His father stood at the end of the driveway, arms open and tears in his eyes, beckoning his youngest son to him. But he would not go.

I bent down and looked him in the eyes. "It's OK son. He is your father. Go, go say hello to your father and give him a hug." My little angel touched my face with his tiny hand, he looked over at his father and then back at me. Then he let go of my skirt and ran towards his father grinning widely, he jumped into the air and straight into his arms and held his father tightly.

I cannot say that my thoughts and feelings were noble right then. I was damn angry and felt cheated. Cheated that I had endured the long sleepless nights, the nappies, the illnesses (my eldest son has one kidney), that I was left alone to hold their hands and see them through their vaccinations, their scraped knees and broken arms. I felt cheated that I had given everything to them, that I had struggled, put my own life on hold- for this day. For the day that he could return and feel their arms around him and see their smiles and feel their love- 7 years worth of love pent up inside their tiny bodies- all at once overflowing into HIS arms- the man who had done nothing for them but cause heartache.

And so that was the day that my boys reconnected with their Dad. A day they and I will remember forever- each of us for our own reasons.

Hilaly's Dark History

2007-01-13T23:16:00.000-08:00

Conversation with my Dad today:

"I can only tell you what I saw with my own eyes and heard with my own
ears. This man has a dark history. He is a liar and a boaster.

Many years ago he got into trouble because he made some comments comparing Australian women to exposed meat- some very offensive comments. The Government said that if he didn't like Australia he could go back to Egypt and he was facing deportation. He didn't like this. He was pissing himself (my Dad actually said "pissing himself"), walking around like a lost man- he couldn't even make his prayers.

He went to the Lebanese community and asked them to stand up for him. A
group of them went to Canberra and protested against deporting Hilaly. The
government gave in and let him stay.

Then when the Iraq/ Iran war started he got involved with the Iranians.
There was a Mosque where the Iranians would go and he would meet with them every so often. They would tell him what to say and who to target.

His sermons at Friday prayers became political. He rubbished the Arab
states, rubbished Egypt and supported the Iranians.

It was then that I spoke up. I said that what he was doing was wrong, that he should be focussing on leading us in prayer and in preaching about Islam- not politics. His supporters hit me like this (my Dad shows how they hit him). They told me to be quiet- they said not to question the Sheikh.

If anyone spoke out, they would send around his heavies to knock on their
door and tell them to keep quiet. This is how they operated. Like a mafia. His
heavies kept people in line. People were afraid to speak out.

He even tried to send some young men to Syria to carry out terrorist
activities. I heard this with my own ears. This happened in front of me. I can
only tell you what I heard and what I saw. He tried to recruit some young ones.
I cannot say what happened because I don't know but I don't think anything came
out of it- I only know that he tried.

This man has a dark dark history. He is only interested in increasing his
own profile. Every Friday he would tell worshippers at the Mosque "What will you
do without me? Muslims in Australia will be lost without me as Imam". Eventually
he convinced them to give him the role of Mufti.

This man is a liar and only cares about himself. He is supported only by
people who want to increase their own profile as well- that's why they attach
themselves to him.

There is more that I can say. But I will only tell you what I heard and
what I saw with my own ears and my own eyes. There are other things that are
said about him- but these things I cannot verify- but I know what I heard and
what I saw."

PETITION- CALLING ALL AUSTRALIAN MUSLIMS

2007-01-12T08:10:00.000-08:00

Recent coments by Sheikh Taj El Din Al Hilaly (often referred to in the Australian media as Mufti of Australia) have again caused a media and public furore.

Sheikh Al Hilaly has openly demonstrated on Egyptian television his incapacity to lead Australian Muslims.

Australian Muslims cannot allow this situation to continue. It is up to us to do something about it and to show the broader community that we are peaceful, law abiding and loyal Australians.

If we do nothing, we only have ourselves to blame.

PETITION

We, the undersigned Australian Muslims, reject comments made by Sheikh Taj El Din Hilaly.

We consider that these comments are offensive to all Australians and are not representative of the views of Australian Muslims.

We call upon the Australian media to desist in referring to Sheikh Hilaly as the leader of Australian Muslims.

We call upon the Australian National Imams Council to remove Sheikh Hilaly from office and to relinquish him of the title of Mufti of Australia.

Three ways you can sign this petition:

1. Go to:

http://www.gopetition.com.au/online/10779.html

2. Send me an email and I will forward an email petition which you can send on to other email contacts

3. If you would like to assist in collecting names for the petition, send me an email and I will email or post a hard copy of the petition to your nominated address.

If you want to do more:

Contact your local media. Write a letter to the newspaper, call talkback radio, send an email to your local paper, write to your local MP- you should state clearly and unequivocally that:

-Sheikh Al Hilaly does not represent Australian Muslims

-Australian Muslims do not share his views

-Sheikh Al Hilaly does not have community support as a leader of Australian Muslims in any capacity.

If you need assistance in drafting a letter, please email me and I will offer some suggestions on how to ensure that your letter is published.

Enough is Enough

2007-01-11T17:34:00.000-08:00

Right, that's it. I've had it with Sheikh Taj El Din Hilali and his embarrassing, degrading and harmful comments. The man needs a muzzle.

I'm sending out a Petition to all Australian Muslims denouncing his comments and stating once and for all that he DOES NOT represent Australian Muslims, he IS NOT our 'leader', he WAS NOT elected into any position and we DO NOT recognise him.

I'll post it on here when I'm done and I'll send it to my contacts in the media and in government. We live in a democracy- so let's take democratic action to STOP THIS ONCE AND FOR ALl.

ENOUGH IS ENOUGH

Dialogue between Jews and Muslims

2007-01-08T21:55:00.000-08:00

I have a Jewish friend with whom I see eye to eye on many issues. But there is one issue that we always debate and that I do not agree with her on.

My friend insists that you cannot have dialogue between Jews and Muslims without talking about the Israel/ Palestine situation. I disagree.

Firstly, there are a lot of Muslims in the diaspora who have never engaged with the Israel/Pal situation and who have no indepth knowledge or interest in it. Over a third of Muslims in Australia are Australian born. The largest ethnic groups after that is Lebanese in the East and SE Asian Muslims in Western Australia. For these people there are other issues that are much more salient than ME conflicts. Does this mean that we should exclude them from interfaith dialogue and debate? Or should we be forcing them to engage with an issue that they feel has no immediate relevance to their lives?

Secondly, what about Palestinian Christians? If we are going to base interfaith dialogue on the conflict, then shouldn't Christians have an equal say and participation? In that case then, why restrict dialogue to Muslims and Jews at all, bring in all faiths and include athiests as well.

I'd be interested in what others think- especially Jews in Israel and elsewhere. Do you think that dialogue is impossible without talking about Israel and Palestine? Why or why not?

Common Ground

2007-01-08T21:33:00.000-08:00

This may seem a bit simplistic but sometimes when you stand back and look at something that seems complex, it really is quite simple:

I've been having a bit of an exchange of Sandmonkey's blog with an anonmymous poster who identifies himself/herself as a Christian and who insists that:

Islam wants to take over the world
Sharia is the absolute antithesis of Western ideals and values
Muslims hate the West so the West must hate Muslims
All Muslims are the same
There is no such thing as a moderate Muslim. Muslims who are moderates are not really Muslims and do not understand their religion.

Seems to me that this is very much what the Jihadis think:

The worldwide Nation of Islam must unite
The West is the absolute antithesis of true Islam
The evil West and their Zionist co-conspirators hate Islam and want to destroy it so Muslims must hate them
Islamic ideology is not flexible
Muslims who are moderate and who live in the West are Kafir and do not understand true Islam.

Then there are Christians who take this view:

Christianity preaches love and tolerance
The best way to deal with Muslims is on an individual basis and to show them love
Jesus taught us to forgive and to turn the other cheek

And there are Muslims who take this view:

Islam preaches tolerance of all races and religions
Islam is the religion of peace- violence and agression are un Islamic
The best way to deal with the current situation is to engage in dialogue with people of other faiths

Do you see a pattern here? Can you see the common ground?

Looking at it this way, the schisms are not between Islam and the West or Christianity but between those who have a rigid, fundamental, unbending view of their religion and the world and those who do not.

Just my opinion.

Fearing Fear

2007-01-08T21:10:00.000-08:00

I'm in the middle of writing an article on the fear of terrorism based on my research and I find myself reflecting on my own feelings here.

Just to put it into context: the project that I'm working on looks at how people are responding to the new era of increased security and global terrorism. We've found that people are adopting both preventative and protective behaviours. Preventative behaviours means that people avoid circumstances that they think are dangerous such as air travel or using public transport. Protective behaviours means that people are taking measures to protect themselves in circumstances that they are dangerous. For most this means being more wary and taking more note of their surroundings on airplanes, buses and in public places.

So I started thinking about myself. Have my behaviours changed? Do I now avoid certain situations? Am I more suspicious of people on airplanes? Do I get nervous around unattended baggage?

To be honest- I really can't say that I have done any of those things. And now I'm wondering why.

For a start, I don't believe that there is a huge terrorist threat to Australia. I guess for me that terrorism is still something that happens in other places. I often joke about the fact that if the terrorists were to launch a 9/11 style attack on my home town they would probably fly a plane into the Bell Tower and that most people here would welcome the destruction of such an ugly eyesore.
See for yourself:

Looks like a cockroach hey!

The Bell Tower is the legacy of one of our former Premiers (head of State Government) and each time I look at this phallic symbol I cannot help but think that he must have a very very small dick!

I also think that because I'm an unrecognisable Muslim (in the sense that I do not wear hijab) that I also don't have a sense of fear of backlash or vilification from some members of the broader community that some Muslims have. I know a few people who stopped going to public places because they were worried that they might be attacked after 9/11, Bali and London. Won't catch me doing that. Actually there is almost nothing in this world that would prevent me from going shopping.

But perhaps the biggest reason why I haven't changed my behaviours in any way is that I've never really been one to avoid situations that others might see as dangerous. I have a strong belief that when it is your time to go it is your time to go- whether that is in a car accident, through terminal illness, plane crash, or while bungee jumping. There's nothing that you can do about it. I was on a plane once with a friend who got really nervous and scared when we hit some turbulence. I mean she was really panicking and I just couldn't understand it. I kept thinking 'well, if this is it, this is it. No use wasting my energy on panicking about it."

I'm more worried about my kids being in a dangerous situation than myself which is I often tell them "don't try this when I'm not looking because I promise you I will find out and you will be grounded for life".

Don't know if any of that makes sense. Perhaps I need to think some more about it. Perhaps I really do have a subconscious fear that I'm not aware of. Perhaps I need to get in touch with my inner fear!

HAPPY NEW YEAR

2007-01-01T09:06:00.000-08:00

Happy goodbye 2006 and hello 2007 to all.
Hope you have all prepared for the new year with your resolutions.

Here are mine. Add yours if you like.

1. I will be more organised

Not really, but I always add this resolution. OK I might tidy my desk or clear out my wardrobe to make room for new clothes but those things usually last a couple of weeks before chaos sets in again!

2. I will give up smoking

OK- not really. I'll certainly try. Last year I gave up for a full 5 weeks. Twice.

3. I will control my road rage when driving

Ummmm- not really. In fact, no, I don't see this one going anywhere at all to be honest

4. I will say "no" when my boss asks me to work overtime, work from home, work on my days off, answer emails while I'm on holiday, work late, come in early, look over a document sent to my email at midnight etc etc etc.

He's gonna cry...

5. I will stop my addiction to handfuls of chocolate covered peanuts after dinner

That one's gonna hurt- really hurt

6. I will not yell at my kids and I will try to treat my 16 year old like an adult

Yeah right!

7. I will spend less money on useless items. I do not need another pair of stilletos even if they do go just perfectly with my dress/handbag/skin/eyes/mobile phone/purse/lipstick/pen/curtains.

Another one that's gonna hurt.

8. I will try to spend more time with my family even if it means that I have to do yucky boys stuff with three smelly teenagers and my husband who think that driving a car round and round in a circle is fun or that hitting a tiny ball with a club and then trying to find it in a huge field while wearing ugly clothing is sport!

I don't know why we can't all just go shopping together, then maybe have a coffee before heading off to the beauty salon for a much needed facial. Why can't we do that as a family? Why does family stuff have to involve me having to wear ugly flat shoes?

9. I will be nicer to the dog.

I am nice to him but it's just that he smells and he does that licking his balls thing and then comes yapping around my feet and sniffs my crotch and stuff. And he shits everytime I take him for a walk and I have to pick it up and carry it around in a little bag like it's something precious.

10. I will seek help to overcome my fear of chickens.

Don't laugh- it's a documented phobia OK. Lots of people have it. Trust me, a chook will peck you to death if you let it and have absolutely no remorse. They are evil, evil I tells ya (except for the roasted ones- they're yummy).

Egyptian Mum Part 1

2006-12-30T01:28:00.000-08:00

My mother travels to Egypt much more frequently than I. Each year when she returns she spends hours lamenting the loss of values and growing immorality among Egypts youth- much to my amusement. My mother could have written the book on middle class morality, which often prompts people who meet her to turn to me and say "you're the black sheep aren't you."

I have become very good at pretending to be interested, showing surprise and nodding my head in agreement as she prattles on about the "fasad" that has overcome Egyptian youth.

But nothing could prepare me for this...

A week had passed since my mother had returned and I knew that the time was fast approaching when she would sit me down and begin her rant. She proceeded in her usual way "you would not believe what the youth in Egypt are getting up to these days". As usual I nodded my head in agreement and shook my head in dissaproval as she continued...

"Would you believe" she said, "that it has become common for the young girls and boys to perform a disgusting act where the girl actually puts the boys penis in her mouth!"

What could I do? I had to think quickly! I had to pretend that I shared her utter abhorrence of such lewdness and maintain my virginal status in my mother's eyes (yes, I have been married twice and given birth to two kids, but to our mothers we are always virgins, OK)

Meanwhile part of me was still coming to terms with the realisation that my mother had just used the "P" word, while the other part of me wanted to burst into laughter.

I feigned a look of disgust and then uttered a half arsed "ikhs" (the Egyptian equivalent of ewwww). I dared not look at my mother lest she look into my give away eyes and expose me for the fraud that I was!

All was silent.

A silence that seemed to last forever.

From the corner of my eye, I caught sight of my mother's face, her teeth clenched and her lips pursed and right then I knew exactly that she was thinking... 'the dirty little bitch has done it!'

The incident was never spoken of again and I must say that my mother's annual morality reports have never been the same!

The Year That Was

2006-12-27T17:38:00.000-08:00

As 2007 is almost upon us, it's timely to reflect on 2006.

The year started with my marraige in crisis. I was ready to leave after almost 7 years marraige and close to 11 years together. He could not understand why and I could not tell him. It was difficult at the time to know the exact nature of my discontent, but as time passed it became much clearer and eventually I was able to accept it, embrace it and work through it.

I have never been a romantic. Fantastical notions of soul mates, star-crossed lovers, Prince Charmings and the like have never convinced me. I do not believe that there is such a thing as Mr or Ms Perfect. I am far too selfish to give wholly of myself to another human being and far too self absorbed to want the same from him. And so, any union would only ever be a coupling of our physical lives. But deep down lingers the little girl with dark skin, big eyes and dark curls, who was always the outsider and who each night dreamed of being Cinderella.

My husband and I cohabit, we fulfill eachother's physical needs very well, we provide companionship for eachother and share in the care of our respective children (we do not have children together) and our mutual assets. But I also have my own world in which he features minimally if at all and in which he has very little interest. Once I learnt to accept this, and to understand the limits of my relationship, I was able to appreciate my marraige for what it was instead of being unhappy at what it wasn't.

I went to Egypt for 5 weeks in July and used this time away to come to terms with the fact that while I love my husband deeply, I will never share with him an intellectual or soulful intimacy in the same way that we share a physical intimacy. And that's alright, that's OK, because I really don't think that I am capable of sharing more than that- I have always known this to be who I am.

In 2006, I gave 9 public lectures, 3 radio interviews and 2 television interviews. I completed 2 and a half chapters of my Doctoral Thesis (I started in 2005), started writing my book and wrote 2 major journal articles for publication. I started and almost finished my data collection amounting to over 300 pages of transcribed interviews and focus groups. Of the 9 public lectures, 5 were invatations from people or organisations who had heard about my work and the rest were conference presentations. I spoke at two anti-war rallies and a Union rally against the government's introduction of industrial reform legislation. I also continued my job with Government two days a week. I maintained my voluntary work with a community organisation. I became involved in campaigning against domestic violence, not of my own will, but by the burden of knowledge. And I started this blog!

Am I tired? Yes, yes, I am exhausted. And yet there persists this wretched yearning to do MORE, to be MORE, to achieve MORE. A sense of urgency that burns like a fire in my being and that I fear will never subside. Why am I cursed with this need to want change? Why am I burdened with an urgent and nagging desire to make things different?

2006 was a year of dreaming. Not day dreaming but sleep dreaming. I cannot recall a night when I did not have the same dream of climbing. Climbing infinite stairs, mountains, hills, rock piles, ladders, anything and everything. Each morning after these dreams I woke both physically and mentally exhausted. Why was I always climbing? When will I reach where it is I need to go?

And so, in a few short days, we will bid farewell to 2006. I think I grew 10 years in that one year (thank God for botox!). I learnt a lot about myself in 2006. And so, in light of that, I will always remember 2006 as a year of self enlightment!

Now... bring on 2007 because I can't wait to see what that has in store for me!

Darfur

2006-12-24T07:23:00.000-08:00

Courtesy of Drima

We need to keep raising awareness of what's going on there and combatting denial and the refusal to accept that this is happening.

You can download this banner from here or from Drima.

Together we can make a difference.

Run for the Hills- She's BAAAAAACK

2006-12-20T01:57:00.000-08:00

Oh dear, Pauline Hanson is threatening a return to politics- this time at the Federal level.

Yes, the woman whose maiden speech in Parliament referred to Australia being "swamped by Asians" who refuse to assimilate is back with a vengeance.

True to her nature, ol' Pauline is back to targetting some of the most vulnerable people in our society. This time she's decided to lay off the Asians (ofcourse since she didn't get elected last time with her ridiculous diatribe about the "yellow peril") and the Aborigines (ofcourse because her ridiculous claim that Aboriginal Australians were getting too much has been quashed by numerous reports about how they are, in fact, the most disadvantaged in Australia).

This time Pauline has decided to go for the jugular of.....

Africans and Muslims

Not one for checking up on her facts, Pauline claims that "diseased" Africans are coming into Australia with all kinds of cooties. As for Muslims, well we all know they will take over Australia by the year 2050 even though we are less than 3% of the population now. Do your maths people. It doesn't take a genius to work out that it's just impossible.

Says Ms Hanson about Africans:

"Why shouldn't Australians know that the people we bring in to this country
are there for the right reasons, and we bring them in for the right
reasons?
"We're bringing in people from South Africa at the moment, there's a huge
amount coming into Australia, who have diseases, they've got AIDS,"
"They are of no benefit to this country whatsoever, they'll never be able to work."And what my main concern is, is the diseases that they're bringing in and yet no one is saying or doing anything about it." (what disease? Does she mean the disease that turns you into a red-head, foaming at the mouth, ranting racist with the brain capacity of a gnat?)

Says Ms Hanson about Muslims:

"Our governments have bent over backwards to look after them (Muslims) and
their needs, and regardless of what the Australian people think," she
said.
"You can't have schools not sing Christmas carols because it upsets
others, you can't close swimming baths because Muslim women want to swim in
private, that's not Australian." (Newsflash Pauline, the Muslims aren't the ones complaining about Christmas carols and the government aren't the ones who ban them- do your homework)

You could take one of her fantastical rants about Asians or Aboriginal Australians from 2 decades ago and replace the words African and Muslim with Asian and Aboriginal.

Pauline, you little fiery red head you, you've had your chance and the Australian public gave you a big fat PISS OFF! You've been to jail for fraud, you've owned a fish n' chip shop, you even enjoyed a stint as an E (as in ewwww) grade celebrity when you flaunted your tush on Dancing with the Stars (stupid show that!).

So come on, just admit it. You're over. Nobody believes you. The Australian public are much smarter than you make them out to be and you just have no facts to back up your claims.

So do us all a favour and go back to making fish n' chips!

Merry Christmas

2006-12-20T01:36:00.000-08:00

We put up our tree a couple of weeks ago. I decorated it in a theme of blue, pearl and silver (because the colour scheme goes well with my carpet) and had much fun adorning our humble tree.
As a Muslim, I've been getting a few remarks about it from other Muslims. It hasn't been too bad I have to say- most just say "well it's your house and what you do in it is your business".
I tell them that the tree signifies peace and that we are celebrating the Christmas tradition of peace on Earth- isn't that what all religions are supposed to be about? Peace and unity and good will. To me the tree symbolises an opportunity for Christians and Muslims to come together on common ground. After all, Jesus is also a prophet in Islam.
As Christmas day is a public holiday, we'll be having some friends around for lunch. A Muslim family- refugees from Iraq who have never experienced the Christmas tradition, some Catholic friends and a couple of athiests as well.
I wish everyone peace, prosperity, happiness and health. Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah and Eid Mubarak (for Eid ul Adha coming up on 31 Dec).

THIS MADE ME ANGRY

2006-12-18T17:55:00.000-08:00

An article about Iktimal Hage Ali drew several responses.
Among them this little gem...

The only reason she got the award is because she is an alcohol drinking Muslim that is, one who openly flouts Islam. The only acceptable face of Islam to the PM and other “civilised” Aussies as opposed to us “uncivilised” ones. She is an Alawi not a Muslim so please don't group her with us. She does not represent us practising Muslims in any way, form or manner nor do we wish to emulate her in any way, form or manner. Islam bans ALL intoxicants including tobacco. One who openly drinks does nothing wrong under Australian law but she has broken one of the leading tenets of Islam and unless she repents she forfeits all rights to represent us and even if she regrets it, there are plenty others who are more conversant with Islam fit to be a leader. There are hundreds of hijab clad Muslim ladies who toil morning, noon and night for the community and do not take intoxicants or mix with drugs. Such ladies will never get the coverage this dame gets but they are happy to be the unsung heroines of Australia. Iktimal had no reason to win the accolade. It was only a political decision to appease the non practising "Muslims" and the “civilised secular” Aussies. To fail to understand that Islam takes an abhorrent view of intoxicants and to then quite undemocratically select a traitor simply leaves me breathless. When will Anglos understand that it is alcohol that causes the most social destruction in Australia today. Numerous studies undertaken by academics, medical specialists and research groups funded by the government have disclosed REPEATEDLY that alcohol costs us well over $2 billion per annum in Australia. The same studies have proved beyond a scintilla of a doubt that alcohol is directly and indirectly linked to an alarming number of murders, rape, mayhem, streetfights, infant/toddler deaths, inter-gender disrespect, pub fights, violence generally, the vast majority of assaults, wife bashing, child bashing and teenage births. Even incest, road crashes and car deaths particularly teenage deaths are inexorably linked to alcohol. Just last week a 79 year old was "turned to marmalade" all bones broken and even security grill dislodged by the offender who left her blood dripping from 12 foot high, so savage was the totally unprovoked attack by a drunk.
Sima Rahman

Well Sima, I suppose YOU are the only valid representative of Muslims in Australia. I suppose your scarf makes you more moral, more ethical, more Muslim and hence more deserving. I suppose YOU have deemed yourself respectable enough to speak on behalf of an US.

These people really make me sick.

MUSLIM SITCOMS

2006-12-16T17:55:00.000-08:00

Remember Little House on the Prairie? Well, now there is Little Mosque on the Prairie, a Canadian sitcom about being Muslim in the West:

Sitcom’s Precarious Premise: Being Muslim Over Here
James Estrin/The New York Times

TORONTO - The handsome, clean-cut young man of evidently Pakistani or Indian origin is standing in an airport line, gesticulating emphatically as he says into his cellphone, “If Dad thinks that’s suicide, so be it,” adding after a pause, “This is Allah’s plan for me.”

As might be expected, a cop materializes almost instantly and drags the man off, telling him that his appointment in paradise will have to wait, even though the suicide he is referring to is of the career kind; he’s giving up the law to pursue a more spiritual occupation.

The scene unrolls early in the pilot of a new Canadian comedy series called “Little Mosque on the Prairie.”Yet that fictional moment is an all-too-possible occurrence, as witnessed when six imams were hauled off a US Airways plane in Minnesota in November after apparently spooking at least one fellow passenger by murmuring prayers that included the word Allah...

“Little Mosque on the Prairie” ventures into new and perhaps treacherous terrain: trying to explore the funny side of being a Muslim and adapting to life in post 9/11 North America...

During one recent episode being filmed at a neighborhood swimming pool, two Muslim characters who are normally veiled leave the changing room to discover that a man has replaced their usual female instructor. The horrified women lunge for bath towels to use as temporary hijabs, or veils, to cover their hair.Ultimately the solution is found when, as the script describes, “Fatima comes out dressed in the Haz-Mat Islamic swimsuit.” The costume designer unearthed a swimsuit on the Internet from Jordan that covers her from scalp to ankle and had it shipped to Canada.

The struggle over what constitutes modest dress is central to the show.
When a Muslim girl flounces into her immigrant father’s presence with her navel showing, he recoils in horror, saying,
“You look like a Protestant.”
She counters, “Dad, you mean a prostitute?”
He responds, “No, I meant a Protestant.”...

Amaar is abandoning a law career to become the new imam, or prayer leader, in the small town of Mercy. His predecessor as imam preaches sermons like, “First there was ‘American Idol,’ and now there is ‘Canadian Idol.’ All idols must be smashed.”Ms. Nawaz, [the shows creator] wanted the show to look at how a native-born imam, exceedingly rare at the moment, might deal with issues differently from the standard imported imams.

Another episode focuses on the anguished debate among strict Muslim
families about allowing their children to dress up and collect candy on
Halloween, a Christian affair built atop a pagan festival. Most North American Muslims eventually compromise because the day has been drained of religion. “Little Mosque on the Prairie” turns it into “Halal-oween,” halal being the Arabic word for anything religiously permissible.

In an earnest manner not atypical of Canadians, one goal of the show is to explain Muslim behavior, or at least make Muslims seem less peculiar, much as humor about Jews, Italians or gays helped those groups assimilate.“On the news all you ever hear are voices from the extreme end of the spectrum,” Ms. Darling said. “This gives voice to ordinary people who look just like other ordinary people.”With its small-town setting and affable cast of characters - even a talk
radio host who labels Muslims as terrorists comes across as rather lighthearted - the show unrolls a bit like “Mary Tyler Moore” or some other 1970s sitcom.

Great idea? Here are a couple more...

The Bin Laden Bunch

Here's the story of a man named Ali

Who was married with three strapping teenage lads

All of them had facial hair

Just like their mother

The oldest one was being prepared for jihad

align="center">

Till the one day when Ali married Fatima

Another wife for him to secretly enjoy

What he did not know was that Fatima had children

Three daughters the same age as his three boys

When Fatima and her girls move in with Ali

Then they knew that it was much more than a hunch

That two wives, six kids and poor old Ali

Could all become the new Bin Laden Bunch

Jihad Days

Farid, a young handsome migrant from Pakistan, moves into the spare unit above the Cunningham's garage. Soon the whole town becomes smitten with this cool new stranger. Farid forms a close friendship with Richie, the Cunningham's son, and together the two get up to all sorts of adventures. Little does Richie know that Farid has come to the US undercover on a mission from a terrorist cell. Will his friendship with Richie and the Cunningham's change Farid's mind about his mission?

Iktimal gives back Young Australian of the Year Award

2006-12-14T03:07:00.000-08:00

Well, all you whingers and whiners on Muslim Village, hope you are happy now.
Iktimal Hage Ali has had to give back her award for Young Australian of the Year and could face losing her job after being arrested on suspicion of links with drug dealers.

Even though she was not charged with anything, the poor girl may also lose her job.

I'm not usually a conspiracy theorist but I wouldn't be surprised if all those people who were so opposed to Iktimal getting the award because she does not wear hijab but does wear nail polish had something to do with this.

What a shame. What a real shame.

APPROPRIATING ATTITUDES TO THE HIJAB- TIME FOR A WAKE UP CALL

2006-12-11T04:10:00.000-08:00

First of all, a big congratulations to Iktimal for being named NSW young Australian of the Year. Well done Iktimal.

Now a word for all those Muslims who condemned her for not wearing hijab and for taking a sip of champagne in celebration of her accomplishment on Muslim Village ...

We all know that the government and the media prefer to engage with women who "look Muslim"- ie wear the hijab. Those of us who don't wear it know very well that we are the invisible Muslims. Journalists will clamour over 10 non-hijabis just to talk to a hijabi, Government funding goes to Muslim women's groups and individuals who wear hijab or any form of the veil because it is seen to be politically correct - forget that some of these groups use their funding to enable women to stay in domestic violence situations.

If you do not wear hijab, you are somehow not considered to be "authentic" regardless of what you do or what you have to say.

At the same time, Muslim women who wear hijab are constantly lamenting the negative media portrayal that presents the hijab as evidence of gender based oppression in Islam and that equates Islam only with the spectre of the veiled woman peering helplessly from behind a black shroud.

We know this- all Australian Muslims know this. SO WHY DO WE DO IT TO OURSELVES?
Why are we taking on the attitudes of media and government that we are so ready to criticise and condemn? Why are we appropriating the very thing that we whinge about all the fucking time?

How dare anyone claim that Iktimal does not represent Muslims because she does not wear hijab? By that argument only hijabis are valid "authentic" Muslims and hence the hijab is the single most important symbol of Islam and what it means to be Muslim. Isn't that the same thing that we criticise in the media and government? Their obsession with the hijab as a symbol?

WAKE UP PEOPLE.
WAKE UP, OR ELSE SHUT UP AND SIT DOWN AND STOP COMPLAINING ABOUT YOUR NEGATIVE IMAGE WHILE YOU KEEP DOING THINGS TO REINFORCE IT.

I'm done.

THE BIKINI PROTEST- INSIDE SCOOP

2006-12-11T03:40:00.000-08:00

Here's the story:

A Melbourne grandmother, Christine Hawkins, decided that she would organise the "Great Australian Bikini March" to protest Sheikh Hilali's infamous 'cat meat' remarks and support Pru Goward's (Federal Sex Discrimination Commissioner) call for Hilali, Keysar Trad and Sheikh Omran to be deported.

The march was planned for December 9th to coincide with the anniversary of the Cronulla riots but has since been 'postponed' to Australia Day on 26 January next year.

That's the story you will read in any of the media coverage. Here's what you might not...

Ms Hawkins approached two local councils in Melbourne for permission to stage the march. Both refused. Frustrated, she then turned to the media in the hope of exposing what she saw as an unfair decision by the councils.

She spoke to Richard Kerbaj- the journalist who broke the Hilali story. Kerbaj questioned her motives and what she hoped to achieve and then flat out refused to cover her story.

In the meantime, white supremist websites had begun publicising the event and rallying people to attend. At the same time left leaning websites criticised Ms Hawkins, her motives and her idea. Ms Hawkins however, remained steadfast in her committment to showing those horrible Muslim men just what Aussie women are made of (not cat meat I hope)!

Then the shit hit the fan. A journalist decided to do some digging and found out that Ms Hawkins is in fact part owner of the True Blue clothing company that was sponsoring the event. Ooopsy!

Suddenly, Ms Hawkins is not so steadfast anymore and began to withdraw the idea of the march- closing down the website and removing her photo and any reference to her in regards to the march. According to my source, poor Ms Hawkins said she felt "victimised, persecuted and misrepresented by both the left and right wing factions and the media". She even had to change her phone number!

Hmmm- the best laid plans of mice and men will often go astray.

Aussie Hip Hop

2006-12-06T21:03:00.000-08:00

Gotta love Aussie Hip Hop.
Here are the words from a song I heard today.

Australians all let us rejoice

For we have no idea

We go to war for wealth and oil

Our land is gripped by fear

Compare this to American Hip Hop

Shake your money maker (huh?)

or...

Bounce like you got hydraulics in your g-string (what?)

what about...

Move bitch get outta my way (ummmm?)

The Really Real

2006-12-06T20:58:00.000-08:00

Raccoon has a fantastic post about Israeli soldiers.

If you were ever in doubt about how much power the media has to select and present a truth (not necessarily THE truth) through images then this will make you think again.

Funny email

2006-11-30T18:07:00.000-08:00

Got this email and just had to share it....

ATTENTION
ALIENS ARE COMING TO ABDUCT ALL THE GOOD LOOKING AND SEXY PEOPLE.

YOU WILL BE SAFE, I'M JUST EMAILING TO SAY GOODBYE.

Sent it to a friend who responded with...

THIS IS AN AUTOMATIC REPLY:
B... WAS KIDNAPPED BY ALIENS YESTERDAY
APPARENTLY THEY STARTED WITH THE BEST LOOKING

To which another friend replied...

THAT'S FUNNY. I DIDN'T SEE YOU ON THE MOTHER SHIP

PERHAPS THEY JUST TOOK YOU ALONG FOR A LAUGH

The Real Borat?

2006-11-30T17:59:00.000-08:00

This guy makes Borat look like an amateur.

http://www.istanbul.tc/mahir/mahir/

Bloody hilarious! I love the way he says "My tall 1.84 cm"- for more of the same you should visit some Middle Eastern dating sites- plenty of strapping young Borats to choose from there! Mmmmmmmmm

This is classic!

2006-11-30T06:31:00.000-08:00

George: Condi! Nice to see you. What's happening?
Condi: Sir, I have the report here about the new leader of China.
George: Great. Lay it on me.
Condi: Hu is the new leader of China.
George: That's what I want to know.
Condi: That's what I'm telling you.
George: That's what I'm asking you Who is the new leader of China?
Condi: Yes.
George: I mean the fellow's name.
Condi: Hu.
George: The guy in China.
Condi: Hu.
George: The new leader of China.
Condi: Hu.
George: The main man in China!
Condi: Hu is leading China.
George: Now whaddya' asking me for?
Condi: I'm telling you, Hu is leading China.
George: Well, I'm asking you. Who is leading China?
Condi: That's the man's name.
George: That's who's name?
Condi: Yes.
George: Will you, or will you not, tell me the name of the newleaderof China?
Condi: Yes, sir.
George: Yassir? Yassir Arafat is in China? I thought he's dead inthe Middle East.
Condi: That's correct.
George: Then who is in China?
Condi: Yes, sir.
George: Yassir is in China?
Condi: No, sir.
George: Then who is?
Condi: Yes, sir.
George: Yassir?
Condi: No, sir.
George: Look Condi. I need to know the name of the new leader ofChina. Get me the Secretary General of the U.N. on the phone.
Condi: Kofi?
George: No, thanks.
Condi: You want Kofi?
George: No.
Condi: You don't want Kofi.
George: No. But now that you mention it, I could use a glass ofmilk.And then get me the U.N.
Condi: Yes, sir.
George: Not Yassir! The guy at the U.N.
Condi: Kofi?
George: Milk! Will you please make the call?
Condi: And call who?
George: Who is the guy at the U.N?
Condi: Hu is the guy in China
George: Will you stay out of China?!
Condi: Yes, sir.
George: And stay out of the Middle East! Just get me the guy at theU.N.
Condi: Kofi.
George: All right! With cream and two sugars.

I'm Baaaaaack

2006-11-30T06:17:00.000-08:00

I've been away in Canberra for a conference and had no access to the internet. Australia is so badly set up for wi-fi. When I was in Cairo recently, everthing was wi-fied- even the McDonald's restaurants. Australia is nowhere near that. I can't even get wi-fi from my home!
It's quite a contradiction, Egypt. A developing country in socio-economic terms, a shaab that seems to have embraced the Islamist message and is becoming increasingly sectarian along the fault lines of religion, a heady mix of anciently old and garishly new, of traditional and modern, of oppression and liberty. I believe there is no other place like it on Earth. It's beautiful but also confusing, frustrating and, at times, downright disheartening. Where is Egypt heading? Where does she want to go? What will become of her?

Next week I'm off to Sydney for a few days. I'll be presenting at a symposium there on the Hijab. Of course I will do my usual critique of the Western feminist take on the Hijab which has reduced it to an artificial symbol and has sought to maintain a status of defiant feminism through a masculinist discourse. But I cannot now, especially after visiting Egypt, talk about the Hijab without questioning how it has become a visual weapon in the war for Muslim minds. How Muslim have also reduced it to an artificial symbol to differentiate themselves from the religious minorities in Egypt with whom they once shared a deep and treasured bond.

I don't think that some of the people at this symposium will like what I have to say- especially those women who truly do wear the Hijab for religious purposes. But they will just have to put up with me I'm afraid.

Anyway- I'll let you know how it goes!

Definitions

2006-11-15T05:57:00.000-08:00

To make sense of things I often end up finding names for phenomena that I think succintly define or describe what they mean. Here are some of them:

THE SHADOWS: where Muslim and Arab women are expected to live. The Egyptians have a saying "Del el rajul zai del el heyt". It means "the shadow of a man is like the shadow of a wall". I've heard this saying many times from my mother. Whenever I longed for the sun on my face, whenever I yearned to spread my arms and touch the sun- she would say these words and I would slink back obediently into the shadows. It is why I stayed in an abusive marraige for so long- why I kept going back to an unhappy marraige-because without the shadows I would have shrivelled up in the harsh world. When I finally left the shadows behind, I found strength and courage and the warm glow of the sun.

ENABLER: I've posted on the enablers before. They are those Muslim women's organisations who enable women to continue to live in conditions of abuse. They are so blinded by their focus on superficial symbols of Islam that they would easily leave a woman or a child to be bashed, beaten and maybe killed by her husband because of their devotion to these symbols. They are part of the women's network

THE WOMEN'S NETWORK: These are the mothers, sisters, aunts, grandmothers who rule the lives of Muslim women. They tell you "you don't need to do this, you just need to look after your husband and do your five prayers and be a good little obedient Muslim". They are like the enablers and they want to keep you in the shadows with them because they are afraid of the sun.

TOLERATER: toleraters are those people who smile at you through gritted teeth. They're the ones who "don't mind" you being around them. They're polite enough and some may even go out of their way to be civil. That is as long as you stay silent, smile and look grateful for every lousy morsel of attention they give you. As long as you bow politely say "yes maam, no maam" then you are tolerated. But if you dare to speak up, if you dare to question, if you dare to say "hang on a minute- I have rights- I'm human too- this is not fair" then look out because the tolerators will show their true colours. They will turn and scream "how dare you? How dare you ask for more? How dare you demand respect? We have tolerated you and you don't even belong here." There are lots of toleraters in the world. They are blind to their own bigotry.

WHYDON'TYOU: The whydon'tyuos are those people who challenge Australian Muslims at every turn to speak out, but cover their ears and turn their heads when we do. Then they turn around and scream again "Why don't you speak out against terrorism, Sheikh Hilali, rape, abuse of women, FGM etc etc". The whydon'tyous are not only blind, they are deaf too. They do not hear us when we speak. They muffle our voices but ironically they hear the crazy nutters who manipulate Islam for their own purposes loud and clear.

THE FLOCK: the Muslims who bleat and baah and do not question, do not use their heads, do not apply logic to anything. They are too busy removing photos of loved ones and lost ones from their walls. They are too busy condemning other Muslims for plucking their eyebrows or not wearing hijab. They are too busy talking about Kafirs that they have become unable to think. If they have mirrors, their mirrors are clouded with the fog of their minds.

THE HOLIERTHANTHOUS: holierthanthous can be anyone but they are usually either Western feminists or niqabis. The Western Feminists think that they have achieved equality (even though they are still struggling for equal pay and equal represention on boards and in government) and hence must speak up for their poor, muffled Muslim sisters. Ironically, their attitude serves only to disempower Muslim women. They do not reach out a hand to help you out of the shadows. They push you back and speak on your behalf. The Niqabis look at your bare arms and flowing hair and from behind their black masks they declare that they are more Muslim than you.

What's wrong with Muslims

2006-11-09T05:28:00.001-08:00

I called my last post What's wrong with Islam- scratch that- I should have called it What's Wrong with Muslims.

It is wrong to blame religion itself for the actions of those who profess to believe in that religion. I would not blame Christianity for anything a Christian person did so why would I do that to Islam- my own religion.

Since I returned from my trip to Egypt earlier this year, I have become increasingly more cynical and increasingly less tolerant of some of the actions of Muslims. I guess it's because in Egypt I saw how Islam was being practiced as a set of artificial practices and symbols of religiousity while the true meaning of Islam was being neglected. When I came back to Australia, I saw these same things and it angered me- the corruption of the religion, the reduction of Islam to a set of meaningless artificial practices, the value attached to these artificial symbols and practices as if they are all that is required to be a good Muslim.

So what's wrong with Muslims? For a start...

1. Stereotyping. For all their talk about how they are negatively stereotyped in the Western media (which is to some extent true), Muslims are the worst at stereotyping. To them Westerners are not just unbelievers but they are all sluts, painted jezebels, bastard sons of dead beat dads and mother whores, drug addicts and alcoholics. They all behave like the actors on Bold and Beautiful.

2. The Moral Highground. My pet hate. Can't stand the moral highground from anyone. And you know what? Muslims are soooo good at taking the moral highground. There are no sex, drugs and rock n roll in Islam- these are things that non-Muslims do. We are pure, they are not. We are moral, they are not. And God help you if you are a non-Hijabi because you are the bottom of the moral food chain. She who is "courageous" enough to hide her face behind a black shroud will take one scathing look at your bare arms and declare that you are not fit to call yourself a Muslim.

3. The Victim Mentality. Woe to the Muslims of the world for God is testing us and placing adversities like the global Israeli/ US conspiracy in our paths to test our Imam. Woe to us, we are victims, we are vulnerable to the evil West who want nothing more than to demonise us and make everybody hate us. We are only victims if we choose to believe we are and to identify with that.

4. Flocking, like sheep. News Flash people- Allah has given you a brain and the faculty to use it and the freedom of will to make your own decisions. Sooooo instead of just taking for granted anything that you hear is halal, haram, makrooh etc, use your head, your brain, your heart and the things that Allah has given you to make a logical and informed decision. Just because some mad man is telling you that statues are haram in the house, or some sister in niqab is telling you that photographs of people in your house are unIslamic- doesn't mean it's true. Research it and find out for yourselves instead of baa baaing like sheep.

5. Cultural influence. Get it right. There is culture and there is Islam. Now if your culture happens to be mysoginist and condones the beating of women then that's culture- it is not Islam. If in your culture, women wear ugly black robes then that's your culture- it is not Islam. Again- use your brains to think about this one.

I think that's enough for now. I'll think about it some more and get back to ya!

What's wrong with Islam

2006-11-03T06:29:00.000-08:00

I just had a thought! Sometimes I have them (thoughts that is) and on occassion I've had some good ones (thoughts that is).

But anyway I was thinking most rapes happen in the home. Yes the home. So when Hilali says that women should stay at home shrouded in darkness and hidden in the shadows he's actually setting them up to be raped!

It is obvious that despite his defence in his press statement that he is... wait for it because it is funny..."an advocate" for women (yes I laughed my arse off too), the whole purpose of Hilali's 'sermon' is not to protect women at all as he professes but to oppress women by keeping them barefoot, pregnant and in the kitchen.

If you look at the transcript of his sermon you will see that he not only blames women for rape but for every ill befalling the human race.

I went to the Koran this evening in an effort to make sense of it all. I felt like I had to do this. I felt that I had to find some comfort and some reassurance from somewhere that this is not Islam. This is not the religion that I have chosen to follow. I needed to remind myself that there was beauty in something that sometimes seems so ugly.

The first thing I read was that Eve was not blamed for the expulsion of man from the Garden of Eden. There is no reference to Eve being tempted by Satan in the Koran. Both Adam and Eve were held equally responsible. So I thought to myself, what is it in this sick man's head that makes him interpret the Koran in such a way that he can then turn around and say that women are to blame for theft, rape and crime.

He is sick in the head and that's it. He has an intense hatred of women. He is a fool. Pity the fool but pity more those who follow the fool!

Islam is being hijacked by fools. Fools who lead fools. Men of hatred who lead men into hatred. Who will stop this? Who will speak up when there are so many fools and so much hatred?

What Hilali said

2006-11-03T00:15:00.000-08:00

Here's the transcript.

It seems we women are to blame for everything- rape, theft, global warming, the economy, war, famine, disease, natural disasters... I'll just leave it to you to read because I am actually speechless. Try not to choke.

BELOVED brothers and sisters, we have spent this good and blessed night kneeling and prostrating, worshipping God, Lord of the Universe, through the prayer of al-Qiam, listening to the most truthful of words. And from the Sura of Al-Ma'ida (The Table), I stand before you to discuss this legal, criminal, legislative position through a Koranic judgment issued by the Supreme Koranic Court of Justice for the crime of theft.

In it, God put forward man before woman. God says, "The man thief and the woman thief, cut off the hands of both as a punishment, for that they have erred" - an example from God, for God is ... What should it be, God is forgiving, merciful, or mighty, wise? No, it has to be mighty, wise, not forgiving, merciful. Not at all. No way. For God is mighty, wise.

So, we look at the penal code in the Koran for the crime of adultery. In theft, the man was put forward before the woman. We come to the penal code in the Koran for the crime of adultery. God says, "The adulteress and the adulterer, you shall whip each of them a hundred lashes."
So why is the man put forward before the woman for theft, and the woman put forward before the man. In the code of what? Adultery.

Dear beloved, God called the Koran the Al-Dhikr Al-Hakim. He called it the Al-Dhikr Al-Hakim. A book whose verses are wise, a book whose verses are detailed. And who is someone wise? The one who prescribes the right medicine for the right illness, we call him wise. And the one who says the right word at the right time, we call him wise. And the one who acts appropriately on issues, wise. All the verses of the wise Koran, at their beginnings and at their ends, there is a connection between the body and the end. Between the context of the verse and its beginning, and then its closing, the end of the verse.

"Forgiving, merciful" has a meaning. "Mighty, wise" has a meaning. "Forgiving, patient" has a meaning. "Patient, forgiving" has a meaning. "Hearing, knowledgeable" has a meaning.
Every verse, when it ends with the mention of one of the attributes of God, has a wisdom that is legislative, rhetoric, in the body of thatverse.

This verse in particular, the verse in the Sura of Al-Ma'ida, when the Koran was revealed, and it used to get revealed to the Messenger of God, there were no recording devices to tape them. And they didn't have then telephones that can take pictures and record. And at that time, there were no cassettes, and even 99 per cent of the people didn't know how to read or write. So they relied on memorising. On intuition. On their memories. One would hear the verse spoken by the Messenger of God, so he'd recite it and chant it in prayer until he memorised it. Very few knew how to write.

One Arab man heard this verse by the Messenger of God, and while he was in his field, his orchard, at his work - he's a working man - he was reciting the verse: "The man thief and the woman thief, cut off the hands of both as a punishment, for that they have erred - an example from God." But instead of saying "for God is mighty, wise", he said "for God is forgiving, merciful".

A nomad was passing by, he was a non-Muslim. The companion of the Prophet was reciting the verse, and the nomad was passing by. He heard the verse. Immediately, naturally, and with refined eloquence, he said that it was not right. Without hearing the full verse. So that nomad asked the companion of the Messenger of God what was he saying. He answered, "I am reciting something from the Koran". But the nomad said, "Your Koran is in Arabic, but you have never had such linguistic fault. Recite it again."

So the companion recited, "The man thief and the woman thief, cut off the hands of both as a punishment, for that they have erred - an example from God." But instead of saying "for God is mighty, wise", he said "for God is forgiving, merciful". He (the nomad) said, "That is not right". The man said, "You, a nomad, (inaudible). He answered, "It's not right. And I challenge you that it is not right. These words could never have been spoken by Mohammed son of Abdullah, the master eloquent. And they could never be words revealed unto him by God.."

He said, "Let's go to the Prophet." He then said, "Oh, Messenger of God, I have recited a verse but the nomad corrected it for me." He said, "Yes, your companion says, for God is forgiving, merciful". If God forgave and was merciful, He wouldn't command the 'cutting off'. But He is mighty, wise, which is why He commanded the cutting off. The verse should end with "For he is mighty, wise". The Prophet said to him, "The nomad has corrected your mistake with the eloquence and good style and beauty of the Arabic language."

Yes, the nomad is right. "For God is mighty, wise", not forgiving. "For God is forgiving, merciful", that's in another life where forgiveness and mercy is hoped for. But in a verse where there is "cutting off", and where there is a limit imposed, God is mighty and wise, so He commanded the cutting off. But if He was forgiving and merciful, He wouldn't have commanded the cutting off.
Also, in the same context, what we heard yesterday in the verse from Al-Ma'ida, in its end, what Jesus said. "And when God asked: Oh Jesus, son of Mary! Didn't you say unto mankind: Take me and my mother for two gods beside God?" He said, "Be glorified." He did not even want to repeat the accusation. He didn't want to repeat the same word. He said "Be glorified. It was not mine to utter that to which I had no right. If I used to say it, then you knew it. You know what is in my mind and I do not know what is in your mind? You alone know what is hidden."

We come to the end of the verse, "I only told them what You bade me. I said, 'Serve God, my Lord and your Lord. I watched over them while living in their midst, and ever You took me to Yourself, You have been watching them. You are the witness to all things'." We come to the closing of the verse, "If You punish them, they surely are Your servants. And if You forgive them, surely You are forgiving, merciful?" Not at all.

Why wasn't the verse ended with forgiveness and mercy? Because there is a crime of polytheism. God does not forgive polytheism, and forgives everything else. These people said that God took a son, these people said that divinity united with man, and the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit, and they will see mercy? They will never see it, not him or his father. Not dad or mum. No one will see mercy, of those who believe in polytheism. Our Master Jesus knows that the crime is big. And there is no appeal for it. No way the judgment can be appealed. And they will never have intercession on the Day of Judgment, because polytheism is a great injustice. If it was a simple matter, the verse would have ended with "For God is forgiving, merciful". But it ended with "If You punish them, they surely are Your servants. And if You forgive them." They'll never see it. You will be wise, You will rule, then they'll cop it.

Those who disbelieve amongst the people of the Book and the polytheists, where will they go? Surfers Paradise? Gold Coast? Where? To the fire of hell. And not part-time, they'll be in it for eternity. What are these people? The most evil of God's creation on the face of earth. The issue is clear. So, the verse should be ended with what? "For God is mighty, wise." Not "For God is forgiving, merciful". In regard to polytheism with our Master Jesus, and in regard to the judgment on those who steal, rob and mess everything, God is mighty, wise. "The man thief and woman thief." Why, my Lord. I am wondering, why didn't the Koran say "The woman thief and man thief, cut off their hands"? While there is "The adulteress and the adulterer, whip them". Why didn't He say, "The adulterer and the adulteress"? It's because they are wise words. The reason for putting the man ahead of the woman in the issue of stealing is because it is the wisdom. This is reality. This is the truth.

On the issue of stealing, when the man is responsible for earning. He's responsible for the expenses, for the food and water. He is the one who has to pay the rent, he is responsible for the alimony, he is responsible for feeding his children. Maybe circumstances forced him and Satan tempted him, and there is a woman like hell behind him; she never has enough. She wants to change the furniture, change the lounge every year. And behind every man who is a thief, a greedy woman. She is pushing him. Not our women in Australia, the women of Canada. The hall up there is full. They are the women of Canada and Mexico, the ones who encourage their men - to do what? Go! Get me! And no matter how much he brings her, she wants more. She wants to change the car, and change ... Of course, the woman keeps demanding from her husband more than his ability. Either she will tell him to go and deal in drugs, or to go and steal. What's more than that? Spend as much as you have! You know your husband, upside down! If you demand from your husband more than his ability, then what does that mean? Who is the one who would have to become a mafia? A gangster? And steal cars? And smash banks? And deal in the "blue disease" (drugs)? Who is the one who commits these crimes of stealing? Who? The man or the woman? It's the man.

That's why the man was mentioned before the woman when it comes to theft, because his responsibility is to be the provider. "The male thief and the female thief, cut off their ..."
But in the event of adultery, the responsibility falls 90 per cent of the time with women. Why? Because the woman possesses the weapon of seduction. She is the one who takes her clothes off, cuts them short, acts flirtatious, puts on make-up and powder, and goes on the streets dallying. She is the one wearing a short dress, lifting it up, lowering it down, then a look, then a smile, then a word, then a greeting, then a chat, then a date, then a meeting, then a crime, then Long Bay Jail, then comes a merciless judge who gives you 65years.

But the whole disaster, who started it? The Al-Rafihi scholar says in one of his literary works, he says: If I come across a crime of rape - kidnap and violation of honour - I would discipline the man and teach him a lesson in morals, and I would order the woman be arrested and jailed for life.

Why, Rafihi? He says, because if she hadn't left the meat uncovered, the cat wouldn't have snatched it. If you take a kilo of meat, and you don't put it in the fridge, or in the pot, or in the kitchen, but you put in on a plate and placed it outside in the yard. Then you have a fight with the neighbour because his cats ate the meat. Then (inaudible). Right or not?
If one puts uncovered meat out in the street, or on the footpath, or in the garden, or in the park, or in the backyard without a cover, then the cats come and eat it, is it the fault of the cat or the uncovered meat? The uncovered meat is the problem! If it was covered the cat wouldn't have. It would have circled around it and circled around it, then given up and gone.

If she was in her room, in her house, wearing her hijab, being chaste, the disasters wouldn't have happened. The woman possesses the weapon of seduction and temptation. That's why Satan says about the woman, "You are half a soldier. You are my messenger to achieve my needs. You are the last weapon I would use to smash the head of the finest of men. There are a few men that I use a lot of things with, but they never heed me. But you? Oh, you are my best weapon."

Hilaly's Press Statement

2006-11-01T04:39:00.000-08:00

I received these two press statements by email. The first was issued by Hilaly in defence of his comments. The second is from the United Muslim Women's Association Inc.

I'll start with Hilaly. First of all there's the high moral ground and insidious references to the "western mentality" as if it is somehow not as sophisticated as the warped Islamist mentality.

Then there is the inference that Muslim women who do not adopt so called "Islamic dress code" are destined to burn in Hell. And as if that is not enough he goes on to condemn those who do not tolerate the "moderate balanced way which I adopt to advocate for women’s issues, national harmony and co-existence, and to hold fast to the love of our Australian home, to protect it from all forms of extreme thoughts and to reject all acts of violence and any act that breaches the rule of law."

What a joke! Moderate? Balanced? Advocate? National harmony?

The fact is that this Press Release actually reiterates exactly what he said- that women should be covered lest THEY provoke men.

What's even sadder is that IT WORKED. The Press Release from the UMWA, who originally spoke out in full force against what he said, now appeases him and blames the media for blowing it out of proportion!

I agree to some extent that it has been blown out of proportion. The Sydney Morning Herald devoted a whole 8 pages to Hilaly's rant. A bit much really don't you think? But that is no excuse to appease him and accept his half arsed apology.

Read it and try not to laugh...

Explanatory Statement by the Mufti Al-Hilaly
Regarding the Recent Media Campaign

I would like to outline clearly and plainly some of the facts and basics that formulate my faith, belief and my understanding of the teachings of the true religion of Islam:

1-The crime of rape against any woman is an abominable crime; it has no justification, and the perpetrator deserves the severest punishment and would not deserve to belong to a religion or to humanity.

2-Women in Australia or any other western society are free to wear what they like, and no Muslim has the right to dictate the rulings of his religion on others. While non-Muslim women can cover or reveal whatever they choose of their bodies, Islamic Shari’a made it incumbent upon Muslim men to lower their gaze. It is prohibited for them to stare at the beauty of strange women.

3- It is my duty as a religious leader to advise Muslim women to adhere to and abide by the Islamic dress code. Having said that, Muslim women are free to comply with or reject my advice, and their reckoning will be with Allah the Almighty.

4-By saying the “exposed meat” displayed in a degrading way is a simile for a woman, making herself subject to abuse by men with diseased souls whose animalistic instincts will overcome them whereby they would abandon their humanity, mind and religion. These men are responsible for their crime.

5-The metaphor I used of the “exposed meat” was not appropriate for the western mentality. It has been quoted and misinterpreted by some groups with ill intentions. This metaphor was used in a private lesson given inside the mosque after the Taraweeh (optional night) prayers on the fourth day of Ramadan. It was meant for the Muslim attendees at the mosque and not the general public and particularly not the general women of our Australian society.

Apart from the above-mentioned facts, I would like to make it known to all my brothers and sisters in and out of Australia that:

After the Taraweeh (optional night) prayers on 27/09/2006, at the Lakemba Mosque in Sydney, Australia, I gave a lesson to the members of the Islamic community of Australia, the title of which was: “Why did Allah, the Almighty, mention ‘man’ before ‘woman’ in the crime of theft? as is quoted in the Quran: {[As for] the thief, the male and the female, …} [Al-Ma’idah 5.38] while He mentioned ‘woman’ before ‘man’ in the crime of adultery?, as is quoted in the Quran: {The woman and the man found guilty of adultery or fornication, …} [An-Nur 24.2]”.

This lesson lasted approximately 15 minutes; 10 minutes of these were spent on explaining the meaning of the first verse, and the remaining time was spent on giving advice and guidance relating to the way a woman dresses and the methods of seduction and the beauty given to her by the Almighty Allah. I emphasised that exceeding the limits in this regard is dangerous to both men and women; and that the devil exploits these charms of seduction to tempt both men and women to commit adultery and fornication. In this case, both men and women are committing a sin. So the topic did not deal with the crime of rape.

At the end of the lesson when I was explaining the reason why ‘woman’ was mentioned before ‘man’ in the verse dealing with the crime of adultery, I said it was because she possessed the charm, the methods of seduction and all similar devices given to her by Allah to tempt the man. For that I borrowed a metaphor used by an author called Ar-Rifa’i. He said exposing the meat in an illicit way would encourage the cats to devour it. I didn’t mean by that to humiliate the immodest women; I meant to censure the person who would abandon his humanity and turn into a vicious animal; and there’s a big difference between a cat’s behaviour and that of a human’s, as the latter is commanded and responsible for their actions.

I confess that this analogy is inappropriate and unacceptable for the Australian society and the western society in general.

I am deeply saddened and distressed by the acts of some devious groups which lurk in the dark watching me, and who cannot tolerate the moderate balanced way which I adopt to advocate for women’s issues, national harmony and co-existence, and to hold fast to the love of our Australian home, to protect it from all forms of extreme thoughts and to reject all acts of violence and any act that breaches the rule of law.

Yes, I feel deeply saddened that such an ordinary lesson has been used to slander and defame me after it had been translated with the ill intention of a dubious media that wishes to incite and they present an unfair campaign, the aims of which are very well known.

Once again, I turn to all the women of Australia and the world. You are the shining lights of the world, you are more than half of the society, and you are the daughters, the sisters, the mothers and the aunts. How could any sane person think of humiliating you?

You are the cherished pearls, the dearest thing in the world. So don’t be taken as offerings at the temples of the merchants of pleasure, or advocates of decadence and corruption.

Each one of us is responsible for accounting for his or her own actions before he or she is asked about them by the almighty Allah (on the Day of Judgment). Once again I am very sorry and apologize for what resulted from an unintentional analogy.

With all my respect to the women of the world.

In due course I will take the necessary decision that shall lift the pressures that have been placed on our Australian Muslim community and that which will benefit all Australians.

The pressure of the last couple of days has had an obvious effect on my health and well-being. I ask the public to give my family and I some privacy, time and space to recover. I have also asked for indefinite leave from my duties at Lakemba mosque.

Sincerely

Sheikh Taj El-Deen El-Hilali
Mufti Of Australia

PRESS RELEASE

The current situation involving His Emminence Sheikh Taj Aldin Alhilali, Mufti of Australia, is of grave concern to the United Muslim Women's Association.

The collapse of His Emminence today highlights the stress that the media harassment of Sheikh Alhilali has placed him under. The United Muslim Women's Association sends its prayers and well wishes to His Emminence for a speedy recovery.

The manner in which this incident has been scrutinised and sensationalised by the Media has also placed all Muslim women under strain. The United Muslim Women's Association calls on all media outlets to show restraint and decency in the reporting of this matter. Regardless of the controversy itself the method of reportage has been grossly intrusive and inappropriate.

The United Muslim Women's Association further calls on all levels of government to show leadership during this critical time and to temper the language currently being used which is inflaming community ill will against Muslims generally and Muslim women in particular. It is disappointing to see our elected leaders using the current crises for political mileage at the expense of the Muslim community.

His Emminence, Sheikh Taj Aldin Alhilali, has been a long term supporter of the United Muslim Women's Association and a Champion of women's rights generally, not just those of Muslim women. He has been unstinting and unselfish in his support for the betterment of women in our society. He has, and will continue to, enjoy the support of many women, both Muslim and non-Muslim, within our community.

The United Muslim Women's Association accepts the explanation provided by His Emminence, as outlined in his Press Release of today, as to both his words and his intent. The Association considers the matter to be closed and would urge all parties, media, government and community to show responsibility and restraint in allowing His Emminence to recover his health in private.

United Muslim Women's Association Inc.

30th October 2006

Letter to the Edior re Shiekh Hilaly's comments

2006-10-31T00:01:00.000-08:00

My letter was published in The West Australian on Wednesday 31 October.

Dear Editor
For Sheikh Taj El Din al Hilaly to imply that Muslim women such as myself should stay at home, hidden behind their hijab or else expect to be treated as a 'piece of meat' is not only offensive but utterly disgusting. It appears the Sheikh would have us all shroud ourselves in black, walk ten steps behind our husbands and hide our faces in shame lest we unwittingly provoke lust in men who cannot control themselves. How, then are Muslim women expected to make positive contributions as Australian citizens in our society? How are we to excercise our right to education, to work, to life? Rights stated in the Quran.

I call for the Australian Federation of Islamic Councils to act on behalf of the people it is supposed to represent. I call for AFIC to publicly renounce the comments made by the Sheikh and to remove him from his role as spiritual adviser at Australia's largest Mosque.

To date, AFIC has proven itself to be nothing but a platform for individuals such as Ameer Ali to promote their own political agendas. It is time AFIC took some action and showed Australian Muslims where its interests really lie. It is time AFIC did something for the people it supposedly represents and sent a clear message to the broader Australian community that Australian Muslims reject the rantings of Sheikh Taj El Din al Hilaly.

The Caliphate and You...

2006-10-29T07:56:00.000-08:00

In anticipation of the reestablishment of the Caliphate what better way to
prepare for that coming paradise than with a quick quiz to help one get
acclimated to the new rules? This test was sent to me by email.

1. When the Caliphate is established, it will be run by which nationality?
a. Nigerians
b. Pakistanis
c. Saudis
d. Egyptians

2. Under the Caliphate, slave markets will return to what city?
a. Mecca
b. Dar es-Salam
c. Cairo
d. All of the above

3. Under the Caliphate, a woman is free to marry which of the following?
a. any man she chooses
b. any man her father chooses
c. any man her brother chooses
d. any man who offers the most money to the family

4. A woman becoming Caliph will happen when which of the following occurs?
a. hell freezes over
b. the 12th imam returns
c. the 1200th imam returns
d. one week after never

5. During the Caliphate Inauguration, Nancy Ajram will be stoned in what
city?
a. Beirut
b. Tripoli, Libya
c. Tripoli, Lebanon
d. Too close to call

6. During Caliphate Inauguration, Amr Khaled will be where?
a. Los Angeles
b. Las Vegas
c. Jet skiing in Sharm el-Sheik
d. Disneyworld

7. Under the Caliphate, South Asians in the Persian Gulf will be treated
how?
a. like human beings
b. like Africans
c. somewhere between Africans and Jehovah’s Witnesses
d. the same.

8. With respect to Darfur, the Caliphate will do which of the following?
a. not a damn thing
b. not a Goddamned thing
c. a & b
d. b & a

9. Please complete the following: It will take Turkey ____ year(s) to seize
control of the Caliphate.
a. 5
b. 10
c. 0, they already control it
d. However long it takes but there is no way Pakistanis will be allowed to
call the shots. Maybe a Sudanese, but that’s it.

10. Life in a Sharia paradise is
a. totally awesome
b. awesome for women since they can be fully protected
c. like Mardi Gras without the booze, boobs, and music
d. pretty chill but only if you get to wear the black turban, otherwise it
ranks below a root canal in Kinshasa.

The answer key:
1. d
2. d
3. b, c, or d
4. c or d
5. c
6. c
7. c
8. d
9. d
10. a

The breakdown:
If you got 100% correct congrats you are officially Caliphate ready.
80-90% correct you have achieved zealous convert status.
60-70% correct you are licensed to work Jeddah, Dubai and Khartoum
30-50% correct you are kafir scum. Get away from here.
0-20% correct you had better pray brother.

I got a whopping 60% correct. Was hoping to get lower!

Australia's "Mufti" calls women "uncovered meat"

2006-10-26T08:01:00.000-07:00

So, Sheikh Taj Il Din (Australia's so called "Mufti") has managed to get himself on the front page of newspapers around the nation again. This time, the man who can only be described as a moron at best, has caused an uproar by comparing women to a piece of meat in a sermon he delivered during Ramadan at Sydney's Lakemba Mosque which attracts perhaps the largest number of worshippers of any Mosque in Australia he blamed women who "sway suggestively" and who wore makeup and no hijab for sexual attacks.

"If you take out uncovered meat and place it outside on the street, or in the the garden or in the park, or in the backyard without a cover, and the cats come and eat it ... whose fault is it, the cats or the uncovered meat," he said.

"The uncovered meat is the problem.

"If she was in her room, in her home, in her hajib, no problem would have occurred."

Well Hilaly- guess that makes me a piece of meat!

Sheik al-Hilaly told The Australian that he only meant to refer to prostitutes as meat, and not any scantily clad woman without a hijab.

Yeah right- seems he is now trying to justify his stupidity.

I find Hilaly's comments not only offensive but downright disgusting. I call for the Asutralian Federation of Islamic Councils (AFIC)to immediately demand that Hilaly step down from his position as Mufti. We cannot have this man professing himself as 'a leader'. Australian Muslims can no longer keep making excuses for him.

AFIC, I know you have been a notoriously useless body that has done nothing for the Muslims in Australia and have served only as a platform for individuals with their own political agendas- but now is the time to take action and do something for the people you claim to represent.

Get Hilaly out!

HAPPY EID

2006-10-24T01:31:00.000-07:00

Happy Eid ul Fitri everyone.
May the new moon bring happiness, prosperity, peace and love into all your lives.

Cheers

HIJAB HYPE

2006-10-21T07:43:00.000-07:00

Congratulations to the UK for dismissing the claims of discrimination from Aisha Azmi's for unfair dismissal because she refused to remove her niqab (face veil) while employed as a techer's assistant at a Church of England school.

Read the story here

She was asked by school administrators to remove the niqab after some of her students claimed that it was difficult to understand her during English language lessons.

I used to be an English language teacher (many many moons ago) and I know that, when teaching phonetics and pronunciation, it is necessary that students are able to see your mouth movements.

Her story has sparked a huge and timely debate in the UK about the veil. What is really interesting is that she did not wear it when she had her initial job interview in front of a panel of men!

Now, I've said before that I fully support a woman's right to choose what she wants to wear- be that burqa or bikini- but I do not support the objectification of the hijab in its various forms for political purposes or personal agendas. If she can take it off for her job interview, why can't she take it off to teach her young students?

The comments by Muslims on this issue has been refreshingly reasonable with many agreeing with the court's decision and stating that the niqab is not mandated by Islam. Yay!

What really irks me though is some of the high and mighty responses from some Western women who refuse to recognise that the veil is often a woman's choice. To them the veil stands as the single, most potent symbol of gender based oppression while failing to recognise that, in the West too, many women are still fighting for equal rights.

The Western feminist discourse largely portrays Muslim women as unable to speak for themselves because of the repressive regimes under which they live. Thus the Western woman is bound to speak on behalf of her Muslim sister. This has effectively reduced Muslim female identity to an article of clothing.

The imagery is powerful. The veil is the shroud through which the muffled voices of Muslim women struggle to be heard. The emancipated Western woman seeks to symbolically, but also literally, “unveil” Muslim women as if somehow the act of “unveiling” will free them of the oppressive shackles with which they are bound.

Ironically, by focussing attention on superficial symbols such as the veil, Western feminist discourse serves to distract attention from the feminist objective of achieving fundamental social rights for women.

I welcome the open dialogue and debate on the veil but let's get away from the moral high ground that Western feminism propogates- let's keep this debate about the responsibilities that go hand in hand with rights. Women have a right to choose what they wear but a responsibility to exercise that right in the appropriate context. After all, Aisha Azmi would probably have received the same fate had she shown up to teach her class in a bikini.

My Three Lives

2006-10-19T07:04:00.000-07:00

Tonight I want to write about my three lives- the life everyone thinks I have, the life I think I have and the life I really have.- three lives.

Life 1- The life everyone thinks I have
This is my public life. A life where I am competent, diligent, professional, passionate, intolerant of incompetence and stupidity, prone to outbursts if work is not done properly, happy go lucky, committed to a cause. The life that people see at work, at University, at public functions.

Someone once told me that people find me intimidating because I seem to do everything so well- so perfectly. And yet- I don't feel like I do everything so well- so perfectly at all. I pond skim- that's what I do.

Life 2- The life I think I have
This is my private life. The life beyond the public gaze. Loving mother, devoted wife, dutiful daughter, caring friend, reliable sister.

It's the life of my waking day. My conscious life. My 'eyes wide shut' life. My driftwood life.

Life 3- The life I really have
This is my struggle. The life that creeps up on me in those minutes, hours, that I lie in bed at night before drifting off to sleep. The life of a thousand words, thoughts, ideas that live in the back of my head and that are screaming to get out. The life that hides in the shadows.

This life is full of self doubt, of questions I cannot answer, of memories that just won't go away and of secrets- big secrets- secrets too big for such a small life.

On my 25th birthday I cried. Not just shed a tear, I mean I really really cried. I cried because I realised that I had reached 25 and hadn't done any of the things I had hoped I would do in the heedy days of being a teenager, when I thought anything was possible. I hadn't written a book, I hadn't travelled the world, I hadn't forged a career in the literary world, I hadn't made my mark on anything. Instead I was in an abusive marraige, struggling with two young babies and emptiness.

Life happens. I know that now. And sometimes it gets in the way of all the plans you made when you didn't fully understand what life really was and how it could just happen right there in front of you and you'd never know. You'd never know until you woke up one day and thought to yourself 'how did I get here'.

I've embraced the tide of life since then and I've let the tide take me where it wants but I still struggle with a sense of urgency.

And I've started that book. The book about the life I really have.

Better late than never.

Freedom of Speech????

2006-10-14T04:30:00.000-07:00

The pro-Israeli lobby is at it again. This time successfully banning an Aussie publisher and a Jewish Academic from speaking because of their views on Israel.

Author shunned for Israel criticism
Ed Pilkington, New YorkOctober 12, 2006

AUSTRALIAN author and former publisher Carmen Callil has become embroiled
in a dispute over freedom of speech in America after a party celebrating her new
book was cancelled because of her opinion about the modern state of Israel.

A party in honour of Bad Faith, Callil's account of Vichy official Louis Darquier, who arranged the deportation of thousands of Jews, was to be held at the French embassy in New York this week but was cancelled after the embassy became aware of a paragraph in the book's postscript.
In the postscript, Callil says she grew anxious while researching the "helpless terror
of the Jews of France" to see "what the Jews of Israel were passing on to the
Palestinian people. Like the rest of humanity, the Jews of Israel 'forget' the
Palestinians. Everyone forgets."

The embassy said the passage had been brought to its attention after a
guest declined the invitation because of it.

The row is the latest element in a dispute about restrictions on freedom of speech in the US in relation to comments on Israel.

A New York University academic had two speaking engagements called off
after criticism of his views.

Tony Judt, an American Jew who grew up in Britain, was to speak about the influence of the pro-Israeli lobby on US foreign policy and at a separate location on "war and genocide in European memory today".

The first lecture was cancelled by the Polish consulate in New York, which owns the venue, while Mr Judt pulled out of the second after organisers asked him to refrain from direct references to Israel.

In both cases, pro-Israeli organisations and individuals had raised objections to Mr Judt's views on Israel.

Mr Judt said his views had been misrepresented.

"The only thing I have ever said is that Israel, as it is currently constituted as a Jewish state with different rights for different groups, is an anachronism in the modern age of democracies."
GUARDIAN

They sure are a powerful group. Just look at what Mel Gibson had to do to regain some credibility after his comments on Jews. Former KISS band member, Gene Simmons (the one with the tongue) made some really nasty comments about Muslims when he visited Australia in 2004, even going so far as to say "Islam was a "vile culture" that treated women worse than dogs."

Incidentally, the KISS concert was the first concert I ever went to at the ripe old age of 15 (am I showing my age now?)

Oops I (almost) did it again...

2006-10-13T07:06:00.000-07:00

I almost did it again. I almost got really narky when someone told me I look like Nefertitti. But it is Ramadan so I held my tongue, smiled sweetly and said thankyou.

Now, it's not that I don't like Nefertitti or anything like that- it's just that I don't see the resemblance and don't understand why people always tell me that I look like her when they find out my origin is Egyptian.

The same with "exotic". Why do people alwways call me "exotic"? What's so 'exotic' about Egypt? When I think exotic, I think clear blue seas, palm trees and relaxation- not an overcrowded Metro car in downtown Cairo!

I don't know, why don't you guys make up your own minds.

Here is Nefertitti....

Here is my idea of 'exotic'...

And here is me....

What? You can't see the resemblance either? I thought so...

Secularism in the Middle East- an impossible dream?

2006-10-04T05:22:00.000-07:00

I've been checking out some Middle East blogs lately- Sandmonkey, Big Pharoah, Hossam. I have to commend these bloggers on their vision for secularism in the Middle East but at the same time I have to wonder about the ability of Islamic states to embrace secularism.

It's something I've been thinking about lately because I have an upcoming public lecture and my topic for the talk is Islam and secularism in Australia.

The basic premise of secularism is a separation of the private (religion) from the public (affairs of the State). A nice idea but is it really possible? Although countries like the US and Australia define themselves as secular liberal democracies- just how secular are they?

Last night I watched an interview with Rupert Everett, a gay actor, who said that it is very difficult for gay actors in the US because the US is a very Christian nation. In Australia, the right wing Christian presence is becoming increasingly visible in the political arena as witnessed by the recent debate on the abortion drug RU486.

For secularism to be truly successful, religion must be wholly and solely a private affair. There can be no blurring of the boundaries between private and public. The notion of religion upon which secularism is based is one in which religion is defined as a spiritual practice- one that can be confined to the private and separated from the public. But what if a broader notion of religion is present- where religion is seen to be more a way of life than a private practice? This is precisely the dilemma facing Islam and secularism.

Secular Muslims, like myself, have no trouble confining religion to the private realm. Indeed, I have grown up with the notion that my religion was purely a private affair- something between me and God- and I thank my parents for instilling this in me.

But for many other Muslims it seems that Islam cannot be a private practice- it is, for them, a "way of life". Islam is the lens through which they view the world, the lens through which they articulate their needs, their views, their opinions- their world view is "I am Muslim therefore..." They define their identity wholly and solely as religious. But religion has no place in the public sphere of the secular state. So where does that leave them? and more importantly what does that mean for a secular experiment in the Middle East?

Secularism is brought into question where the state favours one religion over another- as Christianity is in both the US and Australia. If countries like the US and Australia are operating as pseudo-secular, how can we expect Islamic states to embrace secular democracy? There is no doubt in my mind that should secularism be introduced anywhere in the Middle East, Islam would be the religion of favour.

Is true secularism in the Mid East a pipe dream?

Lifting the Veil

2006-09-30T21:21:00.000-07:00

Ok. It had to happen sometime. I've been thinking about writing about the hijab, burqa, nikab and various forms of Islamic women's dress for some time and now's as good a time as any.

I am a Muslim woman- nobody can deny me this part of my identity. As far as I am concerned, the hijab, in its various forms, is a choice. It is not mandated by the Koran. I choose not to wear it. I believe that modesty can be displayed in many forms. I believe that I do not need to cover my hair to be modest.

I have, in the past, toyed with the idea of donning the hijab. At that time, I was feeling particularly angry and distressed by the acts of violence directed at women wearing the hijab in Australia. But when I really thought about it, the reason that I would have put on the hijab would have been to assert my identity- an act of defiance really- a statement. In doing so, I would have been guilty of what I have accused Western feminists of doing- of objectifying the hijab and reducing it to a symbol. So, to wear the hijab because I was angry would not have been the right reason.

I listened to and read the stories of hijabi women who declared that they rejoiced in covering their bodies, that the hijab gave them a sense of control over their bodies, that they felt they were being appreciated for their brains more than their looks. As much as I tried, I simply could not relate to this notion. Even when I was disturbed by the comments of some men in my workplace about my looks, I still could not relate to this notion. Even when a male colleague told me that I should "uglify" myself to be taken more seriously, I still could not relate to the notion of having to cover myself to be respected. I simply could not relate the problem back to me- if men cannot conduct themselves in a professional manner- that is their problem, not mine.

I visited Egypt earlier this year, and it was this trip that cemented my decision not to wear the hijab. It seemed to me that I was the only Muslim woman who did not wear it. Whenever I had a conversation with someone where I revealed that I was indeed Muslim, invariably I was asked why I did not wear the hijab. At first, the question threw me and I simply could not offer an answer other than that I lived in a Western country and that my work demanded a lot of public appearances where it was easier for me to get people to relate to what I was saying if I appeared to be like them.

But the more I observed the phenomenon of the hijab in Egypt, the more I rejected it. The hijab has become a fashion statement. Young women wear nude coloured body hugging tops underneath revealing halter necks, tight jeans, a brightly coloured scarf on their heads- this is the new 'hijabi'. They, like the Western feminist discourse on the veil, have objectified the hijab- it is not about maintaining any semblance of modesty or being appreciated for their brains.

I started asking women why they wore the hijab. Their responses varied:
I did not want to be mistaken for a Christian
The girls at school teased me
My hair is difficult to manage and I am too busy to go to the hairdresser every week
The cost of hair products is too high

Not a single woman I spoke to mentioned it as a religious choice. Not a single woman I spoke to "rejoiced" in covering her body.

My friend gave me some words of wisdom for which I am grateful. She said "Whenever anyone asks me why I do not wear the veil I simply reply that my hijab is in my heart"

I like that. My hijab is in my heart. And for now at least, that's where it is staying.

Dead or not?

2006-09-28T02:28:00.000-07:00

Reports of OBL's death from Typhoid are causing confusion:

SPECULATION about the death of Osama bin Laden continued to swirl across
the globe last night, but in the three capitals most likely to be the first to
know if and when he dies - Riyadh, Islamabad and Washington - there were
blanket denials of any knowledge of French reports that the al-Qaeda leader
had succumbed to typhoid last month.
Significantly, in view of claims that it was Saudi intelligence that was said to be the original source for the report, an official statement issued by the Government in Riyadh said: "The Kingdom of Saudi Arabia has no evidence to support recent media reports that Osama bin Laden is dead.
"Information that has been reported otherwise is purely speculative and cannot be independently verified."
Internet monitors who track terrorist chatter also said they had come across nothing to support the reports. The Washington-based IntelCentre, which monitors terrorism communications, was quoted as saying it was not aware of any similar reports on the internet.
Officials in Pakistan, where bin Laden is believed to be based in the remote North Waziristan district, insisted they knew nothing that would confirm the reports of his death on August 23. Pakistan's Interior Minister, Aftab Sherpao, said: "No, we do not have any such information." The French regional daily L'Est Republicain reported on Saturday that Saudi intelligence first got reports of bin Laden's death on September 4 and that last Thursday this was passed to the French DGSE foreign intelligence service, which relayed it to President Jacques Chirac's office. Australian officials were treating the claim cautiously, with Deputy Prime Minister Mark Vaile warning against premature celebrations.

http://www.news.com.au/couriermail/story/0,23739,20469613-954,00.html

Bugger! Guess I have to cancel the Ding Dong the Witch is Dead Party I was planning!

Enablers

2006-09-27T05:10:00.000-07:00

I'm angry.
I know that's not unusual but I really need to vent.

There are a lot of Muslim community organisations here in Australia that claim to work for the well being of the Muslim communities here. One of them is a Muslim women's organisation that gets government funding to provide services to Muslim women.

While these kinds of organisations may do some good work, they are often staffed by inexperienced women who have a particular view of Islamic teachings. Very few are secular Muslims. Most wear the hijab or the burqa. That's fine. I have no problem with that- while I do not agree with it I will always defend a woman's right to wear it if she so chooses- just as I would defend a woman's right to wear a bikini if she so chooses.

The problem is that these organisations often only provide services to like minded women. Often the kinds of 'services' they provide serve, not to assist women to integrate and participate in the broader community, but to keep them in their place. I call these organisations The Enablers.

They advocate for Sharia divorce courts. Why? We have a legal system in Australia to deal with divorces regardless of religion.

They advocate for Muslim women only swimming sessions at local pools. Why? Most pools have women's only sessions but they will not mix with Western women.

They advocate for Muslim women only English language classes. Why? Nearly all higher education institutions are mixed sex.

But what really pisses me off is that they often have first hand information about women and young girls being beaten by their husbands and fathers. And they do nothing about it. They work under a shroud of silence and enable these abusive conditions to continue. They prefer to deal with problems themselves and will not admit that they simply do not have the capacity to find solutions.

I've met a lot of Muslim women who do not wear hijab and who have gone to these kinds of organisations seeking assistance. They have been treated as outsiders, as somehow less Muslim and therefore less worthy.

It's not unusual for Muslims in the diaspora to take the moral highground. Heck! Every Muslim I meet tries to make out that they are more Muslim than the Muslim I met before them! But it really starts to get serious when there are women and girls being beaten and the only people offering assistance are there to keep them where they are. It's shameful.

Ramadan Kareem

2006-09-27T04:10:00.000-07:00

Well, it is a bit late (oops) but a blessed and prosperous Ramadan to all.

This year my Ramadan resolutions are:
I shall contemplate the meaning of my life on this beautiful Earth
I shall pray for peace in the Middle East
I shall empathise with the millions of people in the world for whom no water and no food are part of the everyday challenges of life
I shall call my parents more often and break fast with them as often as I can
I shall thank Allah each and everyday for my family and friends

Why oh why

2006-09-26T07:53:00.000-07:00

Why do I have to read Focault? Have been avoiding it all this time and now can no longer do it. This is particularly harrowing considering I have just returned from a conference where the snotty nosed academics with oh-so-proper British accents began every paragraph with a quote from Focault or some long dead obscure French philosopher.

As they so eloquently rambled on about something that I am sure is of no consequence I looked around the room thinking I was the only stupid one who didn't understand a word of what they were saying. Then I spotted them. The Colleagues- there they were in full force to support the speaker, nodding their heads in unison like a flock of silly pidgeons and frowning where appropriate as if on cue.

Why do academics do that? Why do they take their little posse with them to their presentations and why do they talk only to their posse as if nobody else in the room is allowed into their own little world? And why do their posse have a series of prepared questions that only confound the whole bloody thing even more? Do they mean to make me feel stupid? Is is a conspiracy aimed at eradicating all the dumb asses from academia?

Gladly, I was not the only one who left the room feeling even more confused than when I had entered. A few people spotted the bewildered look on my face (was I that obvious) and mumbled as they walked past "what was that about?" Should I be taking comfort in the fact that I am not the only dumb ass?

YEPP- I have now officially joined the 21st Century...

2006-09-23T00:08:00.000-07:00

I am now the proud owner of an MP3 player! For someone who only got a mobile phone about six months ago (yes it's true- my excuse was I didn't want people bothering me all day), this is actually quite a big feat! Feel so ooooooh technologically savvy now, especially because it is such a tiny little thing that's able to do so much.
I bought it for work so that I could make voice files but I was even more excited by the fact that I could download all my daggy music and listen to it through headphones and no-one will ever know. Here are some of the songs I downloaded- sing along with me if you know the words (and you know you do)...

Nutbush City Limits
Supernatural Thing
Bat out of Hell (awesome to work out to)
Picture of You (yes, the old Boyzone song!)
Let it Flow from the Waiting to Exhale soundtrack
Water Runs Dry (Boyz to Men- aaaaah)
No Diggity- a Blackstreet classic
Mr Boombastic

Now all I have to do is to learn how to not sing loudly along with the music coz people are starting to look at me funny...

On Speaking Out...

2006-09-22T05:24:00.000-07:00

There are many calls for 'moderate' Muslims to speak out against terrorism. In fact, Letters to the Editor and Editorials in most of our popular newspapers often ask "why don't Muslims speak out and condemn terrorism and violence." Silence is often interpreted as a sign that Muslims the world over condone terrorism and is used by some to further support the stereotype of the ugly, violent Arab.

I came across this interesting piece in "They Dare to Speak Out" by Paul Findley...

"...the late I.F. "Izzy" Stone, a widely respected author, commentator, and self-styled radical, told me why many of his fellow Jews work so
aggressively to stifle free speech. He explained that, because Jews in
Israel seem constantly at war with Arabs, Jews in America feel that they are in the same war. To them, free speech is a luxury that can be
sacrificed where debate might weaken US support for an Israel at war."
The same can be said of Muslims in the West. TheMilitant Islamists not only know this, but use this to their full advantage. Bin Laden's continual reference to the "Islamic nation" is not by accident. His carefully selected words are designed to
exploit the notion that Muslims around the globe are involved in the war
with Israel. And it's working.
When Mohammed Siddique Khan, the ringleader of the London bombings, a British born, second generation Pakistani said in his video message "I am directly responsible for protecting and avenging my Muslim brothers and sisters" he was not referring to Muslims in Pakistan or Britain. He was referring to Muslims at war with Israel and the US in Palestine, Iraq and Afghanistan.
In my experience, everytime I've met a Jewish person, he or she will sooner or later bring up the Palestine/Israel issue. The first time this happened I was surprised. Why should I want to discuss this issue with anyone? Why should I have any interest in this issue at all? I'm not Palestinian. I'm not Israeli. But I am Muslim.
And therein, ladies and gentlemen, lies the crux of the matter. Because I am Muslim, it is assumed that I have something to say on the issue even if I'd much rather talk about the mating habits of the African sand fly!

Three Lives

2006-09-21T07:55:00.000-07:00

I have a theory. Actually I have many theories- but just one will do for now.
My theory is that everyone has at least two identities-
The one you give to yourself- I am an Australian Muslim who advocates for a progressive interpretation of the Koran and Islamic teachings.
And the one everyone else gives you- I am a Muslim and therefore a terrorist sympathiser who wants to wipe out the heathens.

Scenario:
I walk into a coffee shop downtown to get my 'must have or I will be a bitch all day' morning coffee. I'm dressed in my usual corporate uniform- pencil skirt and blouse. It's packed as usual only because they make the best bloody coffee on this earth! The girl behind the counter and I start chatting- it's usually a guy there who always tries some lame pick up line on me, but today he's graduated to making the coffees.
She says "You look so exotic. Where are you from?"
I say "Sydney", but she's not buying it- she wants to know where I'm REALLY from.
So I tell her I'm originally from Egypt.
Lame pick-up line guy overhears this and looks up from behind the coffe machine.
He asks "Are you Muslim?'
"Yep" I answer
Suddenly he starts seething "So what do you think of terrorism?"
I'm thinking 'whoa! what happened to lame pick up line guy? are you his evil twin or something?'
Instead I say "Well are you asking me because you really want to know- because I've been coming here every morning for 6 months and you've never asked me that? But I will tell you that I absolutely do not condone the murder of innocent people for any cause"
He's still seething and the nice behind the counter girl takes my money but doesn't look at me or say a word.
As I make my way out of the crowded cafe, he yells:
"Look out everyone. She's a Muslim terrorist. She's gonna blow up the cafe."
Everyone stops and stares.

So, what do I do?
a. Cry into my coffee cup
b. Play along and make a loud BOOM sound
c. Turn to him and say "Right mate, you've just blown your chance of ever getting my number"
d. Walk out silently seething and vow to go through the painful process of wheening myself off this fabulous coffee so that I never have to step foot in there again.